If you will be asked if you possess integrity, will you be confident to say YES?
It will surely make you think not only twice. After I read some articles the other night about this value, I was not as confident anymore. I realized that we are all guilty at some points in our lives not having integrity. I, for one, had lied (white and black lies) many times and in defense, it’s always because what the situations warranted. It’s always about justifying that what I did was just right because it was what I thought was best and easy way out of a circumstance.
According to Amy Rees, an author and a weekly contributor to Forbes and The Huffington Post, “Integrity is doing the right thing at all times and in all circumstances whether or not anyone is watching.”
That line alone surely will make most of us feel uncomfortable. Why would we not if some of us renders overtime work without an output defending the deed as right because the pay is low? Why would we not if the janitor, for example, wanders about or do other things not related to his work, because ‘everybody is doing it’? Why would we not if the leadman spends much time on his cellular phone because he believes his efforts are not recognized? Why would we not if a manager thinks he is the most intelligent species in the organization that is why the high pay but is not effective? Why would we not if an officer gets a kickback from purchases because he thinks he deserves it for the long tenure he has in the company? I am sure there are lots of situations we can talk about that that line from Ms. Rees will grate on our person.
Being able to realize that we have not practiced integrity at some points in our lives and desire to develop ourselves is a different thing though. It is an act of integrity, too, to admit that we failed before to develop this core value as an individual, as an employee, as a friend, as a boss, etc., and to desire to change especially if it’s not late to do it.
We cannot just say that we are a people of integrity or moral uprightness without others be the ones telling us that we are such people. It is like faith without actions. Faith is dead without walking the talk, or professing it but not doing the truthful and honest things we must do in any situation.
Quoting more from Amy Rees, “If we surround ourselves with people who are dishonest and willing to cut courses to get ahead, then we’ll surely find ourselves following a pattern of first enduring this behavior, then accepting their behavior, and finally adopting their behavior.”
It’s nice to learn about other quote web sites aside from Brainyquotes which I frequent. I love quotes. They have inspired me in many ways. One of my favorites are life quotes. Here are samples from Quotelicious.com:
A great attitude becomes a great day which becomes a great month which becomes a great year which becomes a great life.
— Mandy Hale
MY TAKE: I realized that a great life does not equate to a life with lots of money only. A lot of rich people are not happy. It is how a life is well-lived by having that attitude of positivity and hope.
Everyone should smile. Life really isn’t that serious. We make it hard. The sun rises. The sun sets. We just tend to complicate the process.
MY TAKE: I really cannot understand why people choose to be indifferent which is mostly a result of jealousy or insecurity. Instead of finding a good reason to smile by doing something productive for their lives, they focus on others who have nicer clothes, or shoes, better paying jobs, or big houses, and fault-find to find satisfaction for themselves. Utterly ridiculous and pitiful.
Your life is your message to the world. Make sure it is inspiring. – Unknown
MY TAKE : One commenter thought that inspiration we get from disability is a kind of objectification. I disagree. It is rather a strong motivational thing to show the world that despite the disability, life goes on. My husband is a physically challenged man. After the stroke, the situation changed. He had to stay at home with the kids (with my MIL, too) and I had to go to work. He raised pigs to augment the family expenses. This he did while taking care of the children. I took part of the ‘taking care’ after an 8-hour office work. There were a lot of stories to tell. To wrap it up, he was such an inspiration that was also an example not to give up despite the trials.
This TED talk by model Cameron Russell is fearless indeed.
“I won a genetic lottery and I’m the recipient of a legacy.” This bold statement defines how the advertising business and most of the world see beauty.
“The thing… that I have never said on camera is that I am insecure. And I am insecure because I have to think about what I look like everyday.” Who would have thought that such a young and beautiful lady would be insecure? But she is.
Here is the video you all will admire. It is not easy to admit the superficiality of it all. While most young girls are embarrassed about their bodies and how they look, here is a model saying she is insecure and unhappy and I think it is because she is not that person we see in Vogue, or any other magazine, but someone who is like most of us, afraid, and unsure.
In a blog post I wrote, Most of Us Parents are Afraid, I admitted that there are points in my life as a parent that I had to assess myself. Am I doing it right or wrong? That was the question.
There were stages that I really got anxious if I was doing it right. I had come to a point of assessing my style, and what I have done right or wrong. I believe most, if not all, parents come to this point of having to gauge their ‘performance’ as parents. I once wrote Being a Good Parent is Not Guarantee. I believe it is so. The influences our children acquire outside the house are varied, and sometimes they can be unreliable. As parents, we do not have control over them. We are left with pleading and imploring the Absolute Being above to take care of them and keep watch over them when we’re not around.
Do you think, as a parent, you are doing it right or wrong? What makes you say so?
This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore. The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.
I believe that nothing is absolutely right or wrong, particularly as a parent. It really quite depends on your attitude. Sometimes you may think that you are right on this issue, but others judges that you are too much over that. Every parent wants to be the best guardian but the reality is against our doing. I know that I need to be patience towards my eight months old kid as he is too young to know what I say. When he is crying loudly without comprehending my comforting, I will be yelling back and putting him badly onto the bed. Later I will blame myself for such impatience. I know that I am not right for such behavior, but sometimes I could not control myself.
definitely bing, this i have in mind now. something like, were did we go wrong thing. and so i asked my wife, what is happening to our kids now? are we really doing the right to in raising them? i still don’t have the right clue and still doubting about me being a parent.
Yes I evaluated early on, during and still doing so. I was not raised by my own parents and under several guardians in my life. Therefore, I have entered Motherhood completely on trial and error. I can honestly say that I have/am doing a very good job at Motherhood. Though not perfect as I don’t feel anyone is, but having raised two wonderful kids who think and behave exactly as I expected says to me I have/am doing a good job with them. I have a great deal of communication with both of my kids and am not afraid to tell them that I was wrong and or made a mistake. I have always been very consistent when it comes to certain rules and or aspects during the raising of my children. I was never afraid to research and or ask other experienced parents as well. Simply for comparison as to what I have done/do, ultimately I usually arrive back to how I personally feel life in raising them should be. The researching and or asking questions simply allows me to reevaluate if what I have done/do is right for me.
As parents, we only want what is best for our children. And as far as we are concerned, we always do the right thing by our children. Personally, and this may come as a cliche, I am a “work-in-progress”. I do not claim (and I know this is true for you and for other parents…well most of them at least) to be the perfect mom. But I sure do TRY my very best to be. I personally apply “The Golden Rule” when it comes to parenting and disciplining my kid…”Do unto others what you want done unto you”. Respect is another one. I respect my child and I would treat her the way I would want to be treated.
It is very good point that you have raised in my lot because as a parent we have to understand the mentality of the child because he is not able to understand what we have to say to him and our point we have to explain him polity what is our issue by shout at child and make him doing as we say it wont work because tamperer he will do it but afterward again he will do as he want so we have to understand child’s point of view!!!
On of those lunch times, me and some friends were talking about blessings. I mentioned that I sometimes get irked listening to other people talking about ‘blessings’. It seems that they are connecting ‘blessings’ to monetary gain they are receiving or equate them always to money received.
That is one question I read that had me thinking. I’d choose 1983. Why? That is when I felt true love the first time. That is when I felt I couldn’t breathe because of excitement. That is when I had my first kiss that sent shivers all over me. That is when I felt confident that I am lovable and huggable.
Truly, a lot of things happened during that year. Alongside the exhilaration, it was also the year my father got very ill. It gave me that heavy, huge feeling of responsibility on my shoulder. But I tried to be strong. I guess it was what made me strong all along.
Which year would you choose to live life over again?
This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore. The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.
I think I would chose to live 1999 all over again, even though I was a child back then I enjoyed life during those years. I had many friends, I was had many toys, I’d always played with my friends in the park. I remember always going to the park during the summer time and having my water guns in gear and running around trying to wet my friends and them trying to wet me. I remember how much fun it was that year, I would love to live that year once again.
1987 & 1989 the two years I had both of my kids. I would give anything to have them tiny again. Though life has been sweet during their growing years, I wold love to have those two wonderful and memorable days once again.
I personally would not do anything different about the years as I would not have had such a wonderful life with my two kids. Sure their ups and downs but remembering I was their mommy and that they were my babies made it all worthwhile for me. I actually would not change a single thing as I want to remember all of it as is.
Hi GF 1987 & 1989 the two years I had both of my kids
And in 1989 I passed out class 10th… Gosh!
Dear Ms. Bingskee
anything between 1976 to 1985 on the first one. My late grandmother me and my late grandfather really were a family and I can do anything to get back to those days.
Then, 1989-1994 – any one for the second. College days. No study and all the activity that I did staying in and away from the college.
And then, 1998-200 anyone for the third. Best part of my life as far as career was concerned.
Any one of the above would be great. Tell me when do I arrive to get into the time machine
It’s not just a year that I’m interested in. It’s for the whole time that Jose Rizal lived on this Earth. If I can browse-fastforward through his whole life, from the time he was born, and until his execution, then I think I will be happy.
I’m really curious as to his vast knowledge, his education, his travels, how he got into linguistics, his whole personality. Would like to really find out how charming he was then. How mysterious. Everything. And if I can take someone with me on this journey, it would definitely be my husband, who has the same level of curiosity when the subject matter is Rizal. 🙂
I think that I will chose 1999. The reason that I would chose that year is because it was the year of my life that I really started to make good friends when I was in college. In addition to that, it was also the year that I fell in love for the first time. I will admit that the relationship that I had during that time didn’t turn out well, but to go through it again would be a great thing for me because things would be different knowing then what I know now.
If I tell you, would you take me back in time?
I would choose the year 1979 cause I was still small and just love being pampered by my family members. It was a great time for everyone back then.
I also would choose the year 2000 as that was the time when my son was born. I just love the time spent with him, just looking at him while he sleeps. I want to him see grow up again from the start.
I would choose to live in the 80s again when i was just a child of tender years with my parents both still alive and taking care of us. I really missed them a lot. I don’t like the 90s coz they got murdered in 1991.
I would choose 1963. My mom was alive then. I would want to be with her once more. From what I have known her now, I just want to go back there, and appreciate her, and love her, and make her feel loved and understood.
None! I’m more excited for the years I have coming. I can relive the others as much as I want in memory, but I wouldn’t trade watching my son grow to be a man and starting his own family or learning what’s in store for me. Too cool to go back.
it would be 2009. very meaningful and rejuvenating year. as if all doors were opened for me, starting from improvement of spiritual life that leads to major change in my perspectives and life decisions change inward manifests outward, I have actually found like-minded trustworthy friends and teachers in the same year and they contribute to more exhilarating changes in me there is no year like 2009 to me. at least not yet.
80s to early 90s That’s when everything is so good, money was never a problem, I get along with my brother whom now moved out, my mom and dad pampered me, and lots of friends, good friends. But now we have graduated we lost touch but once again I looked forward to future because I want myself to find a true love and get married.
2004 definitely! that’s when i had my 1st heart attack only 2 weeks before my son’s wedding. Can’t get any close call than that! Wife was called from my office to head to the hospital dropping all her chores. All family members were assembled, and the in-laws left in limbo. Hospital got the wind that my presence was very essential at the pre-wed preparations so the doctors prioterised my angioplasty, put couple of stents inside my arteries the same evening, gave me a light supper and a cup of tea and turned off the lights for the night. i was home the next day, and we all had our first and best family wedding ever!
I know this is a broad topic because it can mean being loyal to a loved one, or a friend, or a boss. The amount of loyalty of course depends on the type of relationship one has to another.
What triggered this discussion is about a local tv series wherein the villain still manages to get loyal supporters though they know how evil this person is. Contemplating about reality, I told my husband that this is really happening. Even the most corrupt politicians in our country still have followers after the election and after a bunch of cases thrown at her.
In the company where I am currently connected, there are inefficient and unreliable people but still they manage to get sympathies and support. Even among relatives, there are those known to be corrupt and have acquired their riches from questionable ways but still they get admirers, fans, and close friends among the relatives.
Queer as I ponder on it. How is it so I asked Papsie and he told me that those supporters get something from these people. Like parasites thriving on a victim, they are loyal because they have vested interests and they are benefited from it. Do you think so?
I am innately loyal person, I dunno but I am, perhaps because of my western zodiac sign. what you commented on is true, there are just people who will be willing to turn a blind eye and ear for their ‘models’. Doesn’t matter what they did or they plan on doing, they believe the right person for the job is their man. and it also doesn’t matter what the other party is thinking. Overall, I think it is because of magnetism and charisma. I am loyal to other people because of my faith and belief, just like those people who are willing to turn their senses and do some selective sight and audio perspective. However, I am not blind nor deaf if somebody dopes have something to say about the person I am loyal to. Perhaps, it just a matter of opinion and perspective in the long run.
When it comes to politics, I think that the reason that people are loyal to their representatives is because of the promises that they make to people. I think that the loyalty that you see in politics is much different than the loyalty that you see in other kinds of relationships. With friends and family you tend to be loyal to others because of the things that the relationships mutually give to everyone.
yes it is sad to see people who are so obviously corrupt and dishonest getting loyalties from people who should be able to see what is so obviouse to most people and unfortunately these people seems to be able to get enough loyalty and support to hold a lot of power.
Does the idea of sexy clothing, or lingerie, fascinates you? You have to visit http://devilswink.com/ to check on some of these clothing that are naughty and nice.
I know that some ladies, including wives, are not comfortable with the idea of sexy clothing or lingerie. For a change, it could be an impressionable idea, especially that men are more visual than anything. To work to be truly desirable in the bedroom has its rewards I believe.
Personally, I dislike fishnets. It’s not clothing to me. Each to his own of course but I will choose something that is sexy but without the garters or the fishnets.
I stumbled upon an online store that sells eyeglasses and offers a freebie service to potential customers by finding the pair of eyeglasses which is best for your look through a series of questions you’ll answer. It seemed that it is not enough to just choose eyeglasses with stainless frames because you like it. One has to consider the face shape and also one’s life and fashion style in choosing the best pair of eyeglasses.
I did not know that. I just go to my optometrist and choose glasses from the racks and look in the mirror if they fit and if they look good on me. It was just that easy for me, not bothering to think if the pair of eyeglasses complements my face or my life and fashion style. Well, maybe at the back of my mind, sometimes, I consider the color and the made if they can be used in most occasions. That is one important thing to me, that the pair of eyeglasses can be used anytime, anywhere. That is the most important part and the other, I must buy a pair that suits all occasions so that I will not have to buy another pair. For a tight budget, I would not need many.
Telekinesis and telepathy are interesting abilities. They are very tempting capabilities if someone will be given them even for once. This morning my son asked me this question, “Would you love to have the ability to read minds or to know another’s thoughts?” He continued, “Because given its disadvantages, I consider it a very nice idea to have that super power!” I replied that I would have that but with an exemption. “And what is that?” he asked. I answered, “I would love to read other people’s thoughts but I would not have it with my loved ones. It would pain me to know the negative thoughts they have against me or against other people. It is even scary.” “Really? That’s odd.” he quipped.
Would you try having the ability to read minds even for a day? What super power will you prefer, if not the ability to know other people’s thoughts?
This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore. The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.
Although having the ability to read minds is a cool idea, I don’t know if I would want that responsibility. You see, if you were able to read peoples minds, I believe it would create extreme anxiety and stress within you. It would also create hatred towards people, at least the ones that think bad of you. I have a pretty good idea what people think of me already. So, having that power, in my opinion would be more harmful then helpful.
I don’t want the ability to read other people’s thought or heart. I think it is terrible. Everyone has secrets, which need to be respected, no matted what it is. Also, there’s an old saying in China, if the water is too clear, no fish, if people detect too much, no friends.
You are right sunli, also this reading mind is like a wire tapping that can lead you in danger, I hope it doesn’t really exist or if there are people who claimed to be like that, hoping that they wont read everything. For sure that I will always change my thinking from time to time or maybe becoming too paranoid just to prevent someone to read it!
Dear Ms. bingskee No, I will not opt with that one. it is quite a deadly weapon to have in ones arsenal. All it is going to do is hurt me – because I am quite sure many have negative opinions about me and until I read their minds, these things are away from me… and we are having a better relation. I do not think it will be good for me and the relationships. Instead, how about the superpower to become invisible? I can always think of something good if that comes for a day or two. Maybe rob a bank or the hoarded money from some bad people and transfering them to the poor, myself and a few more needy? Nah, doesnt sound that good. I think I will remain undecided and miss the opportunity Is it because I never want to be famous or a well known personality?
No, I wouldn’t want that kind of ability. What if I could do that and I suddenly found out all their needs and wants and as much as I want to help, there are some things that I won’t be able to help? I’d be feeling guilty all my life for not being able to lend a helping hand.
In this morning in my work, Ive been thinking to discuss about super natural power or asking if you given a chance to have an extra ordinary power what it would be? but then as you create this discussion i would like to share my idea about this. As i remember, last last year, i try to search in the internet what and how to learned the Telekinesis and Telepathy because i wanted to learned and have that talent. and then in youtube there’s a lot of video that you can watch and they teach you about that two abilities and the different of that two. And nothing it happens to me, i try but im only wasting my time to try that. but also, i amaze about that abilities. I know some people in this world has have that abilities to do so. As i search to the internet, Telepathy is a direct transference of thought from one person to another without using the usual sensory channel of communication. What if all people knows to used this abilities, maybe using the Telepathy maybe the replacement of using cellphone to communicate other people far away from us.
I would like to have the power to travel back in time – to see the birth of Christ, see the highlights of Dr. Jose Rizal’s life, see how the Philippines was during the time of the Americans, see how my parents grew up. Just simply “see” and not interfere with anything. It’s either that, or have the power to travel ANYWHERE with just the snap of my fingers; or become invisible whenever I want so I can board a plane or cruise ship and travel ANYWHERE. No passports. No entry Visas. Sigh!
I really don’t think that I would like to have the ability to read the minds of other people. Instead, I think that it would be fun to be invisible. The reason that I think that would be very interesting would be because of the fact that you could hear entire discussions that you would not be able to hear otherwise and you also wouldn’t have so many voices that could be rivalling against each other in your day to day life.
Oh my I would be afraid to have such a power and even for a day. There are some things I rather not know. I find that being able to read minds would make for way too much confusion in my life. I am already confused at times as it is and knowing that I could read minds would cause me to read way more then I should. I pay close attention to smallest of details so being able to read a person’s mind will cause me to delve into a dangerous area. Some things are better found out on their own.
It would be so nice if you have the super power to read minds of other people but the bad thing is,it’s like you are invading their privacy because you would be able to know what they feel,what their plans are and what other things they have in their mind that should be for private only.%-)
Well if it is free and doesn’t want anything in return why not. But thinking of it is also kinda scary too. Our private thought will be read by someone and I can’t imagine how will I hide it from that person who has the ability to read of it.
Tricky one. I have been wishing I have mind-reading powers because I cannot understand the point of view of the people (loved ones included) around. I could understand but always to a certain extent and sometimes, I don’t understand the motive or reason of other people. However, I also see the point of others – that as individuals, we already have our own problems. Peeking into other people’s mind can be considered as an invasion or privacy. Perhaps people should be at least a little be open with what’s going on their heads in order for them to be more understood by the people around them.
It sounds very attractive at first but i have given it a thought for a long while. I made a study about this when i was in college and at that time i so wanted to read other people’s thoughts. What if i had that ability? But now it’s something that i fear. I don’t want to be bothered by other’s thoughts, especially my family. It would pain me to learn the truth and what i might learn might hurt me and hurt my relationship with others. So i’m contented not knowing what’s going on in their minds.
I don’t think that I would want to know what people are thinking especially if it is about me. If they think of something bad against me then I will take it the bad way. It will be weird if I am angry with them without them knowing why. I like to have the ability to be invincible or transport from place to place. I am late all the time so I would want to be in a place in just a snap.
I wouldn’t want that ability to read other peoples minds. I have a hard enough time reading my own mind. I just like the way I am. If everyone in the world were able to read minds then it would be normal. I would so like the invisible power.
Hehehehehe. You are amusing, smile. How true indeed to the name that you have chosen. This is the first time that I have encountered someone who claims to be finding it hard to read one’s own mind. lol. But to wish to have the power of invisibility! I think that is the most powerful tool that anyone can have and thus, almost anyone wants to have it, too.
Having the power of knowing others mind would be a good thing when we take everything as positive. Its sometimes creates problems also others wont accept when u say them about what they had thinked about u negative. But i assure u that humans can have those powers i tried some books to learn telekinesis and telepathy. Its not the process of knowing others mind. Telekinesis is science of moving objects and telepathy is conveys message from our mind to others mind. But knowing others mind is a occultism manner that we have to learn if we had more esp powers with us.
If given a chance to have a super power at least for a day,i’d like to have super charm power..My mother sells cooked food everyday,maybe if i have the ability to charm people in,she wont have a hard time selling her goods..don’t like to read other people’s mind because i respect privacy too much as i want my privacy be respected..
Well, interesting question. If i was given a super power just for one day, i would like to have a power which can enable me to hit the jackpot with one lottery. And with the money, i can accomplish my dreams such as travelling around the world, having a further study in U.S.A and letting my parents get retired in advanced. Wow, even imagining of the picture can make me very happy. I have got to admit that i am not a good Samaritan. I should help others out as soon as i am rich. But that is what is at the bottom of my heart.
Quite interesting.Telekinesis and telepathy are nice ability if I have super power.But given a chance to have a super power I would like to choose Superman’s power,cause I really wanted to fly to see the whole world..
Wouldn’t it be great if you could read mines? It would be like the movie “What a woman wants”, it’d be so cool to read anyone’s thoughts! Like when a teacher flips a question towards you, you could just read her mind to find the answer! I could even cheat in my exams! But I think there’s a lot of disadvantages to this kind of super power. If you could read minds, what if you were in a crowd and everyone started to think at once. You would go bonkers! Also, like you said, you don’t want to strive in your loved ones’ deep sorrows and thoughts they wish to keep private from anyone else. You also don’t want to accidentally hear a random person’s dirty thoughts either.
No way. I wouldn’t want to know what others were thinking, except in a very few cases and then I’m not sure I’d really want to know. I don’t know what power I’d like to have. None, really. They all come with a price that I don’t think I’d want to pay.
I could probably handle reading other people’s thoughts. It’s not for everyone. I think most people would have their feelings hurt pretty quickly.
agree with what you’ve said. I think it would be fun for me to read others thought so that at least I know what they’re going to do or say. Lie in these situations. If we’re going to have an examination, I would just read my seatmate’s mind. Haha I wouldn’t have a hard time. Just kidding. I don’t want to cheat. Another is, if I were in a public place and I saw someone who looks strange then I would read his mind and If I come to read that he is going to hold up someone or to do ban things at least I can do something to stop but not in an obvious way. I know some would not believe at first if they came to know that I can read minds so If I have this ability, I would just keep it in myself. Like what you’ve said, I also don’t like to read my loved ones thoughts. I don’t want to know their negative thoughts about me because I know its going to hurt me. Its painful especially if I have a boyfriend and were on a date then suddenly a pretty girl passes by, then I read his thought that “Ohh, that is so pretty, I wish she is my girlfriend.” Ouch. It hurts. Just like you, I like to read minds but with exemption.
Hey, I think I know a movie like this. Do you know the movie “What Women Wants” starring Mel Gibson? I think in this movie he can read minds of girls that gets near him.
would like to have superpowers. I will never say no to any of them at all. However, the situation will be that I have full control over all and above it. Meaning, I can read minds and hear people’s thoughts only if I want to, only if I choose to. I will not be reading the minds of all the people in this world spontaneously or severally at all. Just like how telekinesis takes place. People with this gift moves things or whatever matter only if they concentrate while doing it. As for telepathy, it is a one good thing to have. Whenever you concentrate on a love one, you will immediately know whether you are needed by the person or not at any point in his/her life. Superpowers are really good to have. However, superresponsibilities also go with it.
Note: This is a topic I wrote once in a discussion board.We have to accept the fact that this happens or could happen to a lot of girls and women.
When I had my relationship with boyfriend turned husband, I had prepared myself of the truth that there is possibility that we can be separated, or that he will break up with me. Thinking about it, it literally makes the heart feel like it is being cut. I digress.
I thought before that if he breaks up with me, I will ask why and maybe further ask him if there is a chance for us to give the relationship another go as we discuss what went wrong. I will definitely not beg. It maybe painful but I will not beg for someone’s love.
we are still 2 years in our marriage and i did not think of that possibility ever. now, you had made me to think. Thank you very much for this discussion. That made me realize that I should think about this ahead of time just in case. so that we will be ready when the time comes. i am not sure what to do then. maybe, i’ll continue with my life without him even we think it will be terrible esp if you have children. it would be difficult and it will be a heartache. But life must go on and we should all move on so that we will not be stuck and forever be miserable!!! but by the meantime, i am trying to think positive! in that way, i will have a happy life! =p
Ouch..this is the word that came out of my mind the first time i read the title. Like you, I have already prepared myself for the possibility that my boyfriend might break up with me. We have been through a lot of ups and downs already and thinking of the future makes me think twice now. My boyfriend himself told a friend of his that there is still no certainty that we will end up together, although we had plans of getting married in the future, still both of us are uncertain. Especially now that we are apart .. I will most definitely not beg for him to go back to me, I will let him go. I now it’s very hard and even hurts a lot, but if that’s what he thinks is best for us and if that’s the only way to make him happy then i will surely let him go. Of course I will ask for an explanation and we should talk about it..it’s much harder if you don’t know what went wrong with the relationship.
I believe as I got older It was then I started to understand more. Although break ups are difficult and at times painful as I have gotten older, I have learned to tell myself that I did all I could do to preserve the relationship and well it just did not work. Although I say to myself, oh well it does not mean I do not hurt it is a way to comfort my feelings. As I too will absolutely not beg. When a man says to me it is over, that is all I have to hear, it is over no if and or but. I could quickly ask if his mind is made up and then oh well it just did not work.
Oh, dear that is really painful of course specially if he will leave for no reason or if the reason is the third party. For me, O will just let go. It’s better to die once than to die over and over again because of the so much pain that the relationship caused you. But as long as he loves me and I feel that he loves me, I will still hang on to the love we have for each other. I will just give him some space and time to think things over.
You have a strong will. I agree with you your idea. Never beg love’s another. They will not think little of women, special our love!!! Give our love to everyone who love me.
When my ex left it was a surprise. He was there and then he wasn’t.I didn’t have time to think about us parting. With my current guy? I can’t and won’t imagine us parting. We can talk over Everything . So if he falls out of love with me , I Know he will tell me and that’s when I’ll let him go. I love him that means I want him to be happy with or without me.
it is really hard to give advice since i myself went tru the same process of pushing myself to move on… well, if he did, try to focus on something, make yourself busy..
This is an awful experience.., I had a boyfriend who broke up with me.., I was hurt.., My pride was shattered and I wonder what I had done wrong.., The good thing about it was.., we have not been together for a long time and i didn’t fell for him that heavily yet.., so i was stood up after i stumbled and told myself that it was his loss.., not mine.., and i succeeded.., he tried more that 5 times to get back with me after a year.., but i never gave him the chance again..=)
well about me when i love a guy im totally blind. is like people say he is not the right guy and i dont care. i just trust that guy and then get hurt. also when they show they are not interested anymore but dont say it i cant understand it. is like i care so much that cant see the obvious. but for now i decided just like you say dont beg for someone’s love. i used to be after the person when there are arguements but i just decided i wont bcs is always me getting hurt and nervous. if the guy really loves me he will come to me without i do any 🙂 and i have to trust this 🙂
I remembered the first time that happened to me, I actually begged of him not to leave me. I think I was so stupid for doing that and if I remember it now, I could just laugh at myself. Anyway, it happened to me again after a few years but I didnt beg anymore. I am just so glad now I didnt end up with them.
t is very clear that the person has no feelings for you anymore thats why he is breaking up with you. i know it is hard but if i were you you just don’t bother asking him what went wrong. once its over its really over. you just have to pull yourself together and move on.
I have no idea. Really. I have thought about it of course, but just the thought of him leaving me is just really heart breaking. Though I totally agree with you that I would never beg for him to love me. I mean, it’s still his life, and if he chooses to be without me or with another woman, then I don’t think I can do anything about it anymore, I would just show him what he lost, and that it is his lost in the end and not mine, even if it breaks my heart badly. Hehe.
I will ask him to wait until our children to be old enough to understand. Maybe for another 3 years.It’s because right now I can’t be separate from my kids. And when a couple get divorce, they will divide the kids or maybe he will have a schedule for taking my kids to his place. And I don’t want that, at least not now,when they still need me. But if the reason is because he had an affair, then I won’t wait longer, and get divorce as quick as I can, since according to the law, I’ll get full custody on my kids, and he will get only a visit time with my permission.
…in my manly opinion..=)…there is nothing wrong in begging if you really love someone..begging once is enough, at least you show that you love that person and you want to fight for him back to your life….however, if he turns you down, that means it is not your lost, but his lost…loving someone always have its consequences, and that is to be prepared of everything, that includes getting hurt and hurting others…although, i know that girls do have their pride as a woman, but pride should not be the ruler of love…=)
I agree we shouldn’t beg for love. Breaking up with a boyfriend/ girlfriend is a part of seeking the right one for you. Yet, breaking up in the middle of marriage needs time to work things out and if the enough time comes, then you decide. Love isn’t begging.
Good for you, for bagging will be a 1000 times stroke to this inconsiderate cow’s ego. If he breaks up with me of course I would be distress for obvious reasons but do I force love out of someone for me, of course not. Personally I would not even ask if there’s a chance for us because obviously he must have given the break up a good thought before he comes to confront so I WILL CERTAINLY LET HIM GO IN PEACE FOR IT MEANS IT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE. Grieve for a couple of days, wipe the tears and go on. There more to life!!!!
I myself just tried to move on My ex husband walked out we had alot going wrong in our marriage and a tragedy that we just could not overcome by being together at the time I know that now….I moved on the best I could with my 2 kids and me and kept going forward…Now my ex and I are talking again and he has come back to me I have not begged him sometimes people just need to be apart…It’s taken 2 and half years for my ex to realize his heart is with me and his kids and I am scared every day now that I’m giving him another chance again of a broken heart….But I will be careful and do what is right for me and my kids…I hope that you get what your heart desires.
Just like most women do, we would ask why? Probably what have we done wrong for him to let us go? And, I’d insist an answer, an honest answer. However, I will not ask for a second chance with him. I don’t believe in that. When one decided to let go, it means that he/she had thought of it a thousand and one times before finally blurting it out. He/She has weighed things putting everything into consideration. When it is over for him, then, it is also over for me. Like you, I will not beg. I am not a beggar and I’m sure I will find someone a lot better than he is…
If this will happen to me, probably I won’t be able to handle it. I just can’t imagine myself in that kind of situation. Yes for breakups, but if HE will be the one who will break up with me then that’s a different story. Although we are now living in the modern world, I still hope that my man would still be gentleman enough to not do that to me. I can accept if he’ll show me that he no longer like/love me and wait for me to break up with him instead of him breaking up with me. I envy you because you’re already prepared.
If he breaks up with me, I’m not sure what I’ll do. I’ll be too heartbroken and hurt to think. Yes, I’m readying myself for that possibility, but no matter how ready you think you get, when it happens you will go crazy specially when you give everything you can to that person. My boyfriend cheated on me once, if he breaks up with me, I’ll be ok with it. For me it would be better than him cheating on me again.
Note: This is one of my earliest topics in a discussion board that I transported to this blog. I will be including the comments (but not my responses) of those who participated in the discussion.
A relative was devastated because her daughter got pregnant while still in college. She vowed that she will not let her go to school anymore. She was apprehensive that she might get pregnant again.
I told her that it will be beneficial for everybody that her daughter goes back to school again after giving birth.
Will you heed my advice if something like this happens to you, as a mother? And if you are a young teen or a young woman who committed such mistake, are you going to pursue your studies and your dreams?
Getting pregnant is not a hindrance to continue her studies, in fact she needs to study more not only for herself but for the benefit of her child.
yes i agree with you. i don’t think her daughter will commit the same mistake again after what she has been through.. she’ll learn from her mistakes anyway. there’s always a saying: fool me once , shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.. 🙂
Of course I would send her back. Because how can she have a future without the education to raise her child. I would do whatever it took to make sure my grandchild was cared for and that my child could afford the life a child needs. Only way to get that is to get an education so you can get a reasonable paying job.
Why would she not send her daughter to college because she’s pregnant? To tell you the truth, I don’t agree with you either! She can still go to college even if she’s pregnant! I don’t think that just because she’s pregnant means everything that shes doing should be stopped. She can still go even before she gives birth to the baby. Tell your relative that she cannot make her to stop her education. She is gonna miss a year of her life by just staying at home doing nothing. People will eventually come to know about her situation, so why hide? she will have a baby to support, so she’ll have to try and stand on her own now. Im a young woman and I commited the same mistake while I was doing my PG. But that didnt stop me from pursuing my studies and dreams and now I have a respectable job and Im able to stand on my own and support my family. Im a good mother. I give time for my children and I never allowed my family matters to hamper my studies and never let my studies come between my family. Even my family members never left my side even though I let them down. Now Im married to the same guy, have two wonderful kids and don’t have any regrets! I think your relative will learn from my example.
i don’t understand why she can’t go to school while she is pregnant.it’s not like she is 15yr’s old at that age you are an adult and i think after she has the baby it is going to be hard for her to go back to school because who is going to watch the baby while she goes to school?
It would be even more important for her to finish her education now. She has a baby to support. Why is she sure that she would get pregnant again. Does the daughter want to go back to school? Did she keep the baby? I would want my daughter to go back to school so she could get a good job to support the baby. I really thought that you were going to say that she was in high school. That is a big lesson to learn not just a quick thing to get over. So I wouldn’t think that she would do it again.
I instantly became curious as a cat, too! Curious Cat posed these questions that I answered:
1) What was the name of your first grade teacher?
I remember a name as Ms. Buan (pronounced as ‘bwan’). It was easy for me to remember because it sounds like the word buwan which is a Filipino word for moon or month.
2) What was the worst smell you have ever smelled?
Eww. The worst smell for me is that of a decaying carcass of a rat. It could evacuate my bowels, or make me gag, once I smell it.
3) What is something you would attempt if you were guaranteed not to fail, and explain why you haven’t tried it yet?
It is my greatest desire to resign from my current work and try digital entrepreneurship. The thing is, I am uneasy and apprehensive still because of the possible failure or when things will not work as I expect them to be, even with a guarantee that I will not fail. Yes, I am that indecisive.
4) Show and Tell. What comes to mind first when you see this picture? Or, tell a story if it reminds you of one.
The picture reminds me of hope. I am not sure why but the leaves portray the dissipating snow and the thought promises sunlight.
We do not experience snow here in the Philippines but currently the weather is very cold, which is unusual for most Filipinos. It is not very comfortable and the feeling always make me want to laze around the house instead of going to work. 😀
Arguments are good if what turns out of it is positive. Most often that not, arguments end up violent, favoring no one because both of the contending parties believe that their process of reasoning is more favorable than the other. Arguments should be made to persuade but unfortunately, there are people who just loves to argue. In my article Types of People Who Love to Argue, I pointed out these three types of people who love to argue.
The Attention Seeker
You may visit it at bingskee.hubpages.com/hub/ for a list of other related articles.
In relation to this, I am sharing these quotes:
“I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don’t even invite me.” -Dave Barry
Or maybe people steer clear of him because he is one of those types I mentioned.
“Without contraries is no progression. Attraction and repulsion, reason and energy, love and hate, are necessary to human existence.” – William Blake
Mr. Blake can be the reformist type. In respect though, for people who airs their view contrary to popular beliefs or concepts, I believe it is not about the love for an argument for argument’s sake but the need to express a view that is believed to be more logical, or practical.
“No sensible man ever engages, unprepared, in a fencing match of words with a woman.” -Wilkie Collins, The Woman in White
I find the above quote funny. Most women are born fighters, I believe. 😀