Papsie does not walk that smart anymore. Being afflicted with stroke due to hypertension, he has to go into limps. I know how this had affected my husband so much. He had many aspirations in life. He wanted to be successful. For him, it was just a waste that he took a five-year engineering course and then land into a condition where he cannot do the things he had envisioned. It was not easy for him and for everybody who loves him. It was not easy for me.
That was 1988 when he was afflicted with stroke, the left part of his body (excluding the head and the face) was affected. He cannot move normally since then, and drove me into fits of sleepless nights because he wanted me to find another one and just forget about him. Then we got married 1989. My parents got mad at me. We doubted that we could have kids but we bore two beautiful and intelligent kids.
Currently, my husband stays at home though the strokes had stopped. He stopped working (he once had tended hogs for a living then put up a small burger business afterwards) because the doctors have told him that he should not be stressed. He can do light exercises but not heavy ones. But he still drives the car, tends to domestic matters, and attends to legal matters, too, and many more.
I wrote the poem
Going to a Dream Land thinking that if he would wish to stay in a place where he could be given the chance to do the things he wanted to do and walk and move as normal as before, I would give the go-head. Even if it means that we will be apart from each other. I would not deprive him of the happiness of being ‘normal’ again, which was lost for many years. I love him so much that my loneliness is nothing compared to the happiness he should have.