The quality of your attention determines the quality of other people’s thinking.
This is so true.
Probably you and the other end are not on the same wavelength. Or the being was bored s/he wanted to sleep. Or there are other things in mind not parallel with each other. Or the whole exercise is boring.
Sometimes people around make it so obvious that what you talk about is uninteresting. Does that make you a boring person? Maybe yes, maybe no. It depends, actually.
Sometimes when people just agree, it makes you feel dull. A conversation does not have to be agreement all the time. But it is worse when you don’t get an answer at all. As the saying goes, “A good listener is not someone who has nothing to say.”
There was one person I remember who had boldly rebuked what I did and said. Of course, I defended myself, which is but natural to anybody being criticized. The conversation lasted smoothly and with me asking in the end, “Does that make me a bad person?” “Yes,” went the answer. I winced but bravely accepted the fact that I was at that time bad.
And there was this individual who thinks of self as Grade A, as in superlative, and you are left beholden to be a listener to the repetitive self-adulation. Uninteresting fool, and I was not entertained.
Is there ever an ideal conversation? I’d like to think that there is, even with the shortcomings of the other end. With wit and humor come the lasting thoughts of beautiful and unforgettable conversations.