53 and pregnant, so what?

A pregnant woman
A pregnant woman (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In the Today’s show, this was the topic. The bone of contention is if the woman will be healthy enough to take care of a child.

One of the panelists said that he had his first biological son when he
was 49 and he thinks he is a better parent because he is smarter and he
has enough knowledge on things.

Do you agree?

Continue reading “53 and pregnant, so what?”

Would you give away your child after birth upon learning about the birth defect?

English: “This newborn is displaying the birth defect known as [:w:Polydactylia|Polydactylia] involving both feet.” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
As others had opined, this is truly a tough question and scary to think about.

As an able mother, meaning one that has all the resources and readiness to take care of a child, giving a child with a birth defect is not an option. The child did not ask to be born. It is not even his or her fault to be with defect so why would a mother give away a child? A mother should love without conditions and that is the essence of it all.

Continue reading “Would you give away your child after birth upon learning about the birth defect?”

You are loyal to someone because…

I know this is a broad topic because it can mean being loyal to a loved one, or a friend, or a boss. The amount of loyalty of course depends on the type of relationship one has to another.

What triggered this discussion is about a local tv series wherein the villain still manages to get loyal supporters though they know how evil this person is. Contemplating about reality, I told my husband that this is really happening. Even the most corrupt politicians in our country still have followers after the election and after a bunch of cases thrown at her.

In the company where I am currently connected, there are inefficient and unreliable people but still they manage to get sympathies and support. Even among relatives, there are those known to be corrupt and have acquired their riches from questionable ways but still they get admirers, fans, and close friends among the relatives.

Queer as I ponder on it. How is it so I asked Papsie and he told me that those supporters get something from these people. Like parasites thriving on a victim, they are loyal because they have vested interests and they are benefited from it. Do you think so?

———-

From jeaneyvonne

I am innately loyal person, I dunno but I am, perhaps because of my western zodiac sign. what you commented on is true, there are just people who will be willing to turn a blind eye and ear for their ‘models’. Doesn’t matter what they did or they plan on doing, they believe the right person for the job is their man. and it also doesn’t matter what the other party is thinking. Overall, I think it is because of magnetism and charisma. I am loyal to other people because of my faith and belief, just like those people who are willing to turn their senses and do some selective sight and audio perspective. However, I am not blind nor deaf if somebody dopes have something to say about the person I am loyal to. Perhaps, it just a matter of opinion and perspective in the long run.

From dorannmwin

When it comes to politics, I think that the reason that people are loyal to their representatives is because of the promises that they make to people. I think that the loyalty that you see in politics is much different than the loyalty that you see in other kinds of relationships. With friends and family you tend to be loyal to others because of the things that the relationships mutually give to everyone.

From lilaclady

yes it is sad to see people who are so obviously corrupt and dishonest getting loyalties from people who should be able to see what is so obviouse to most people and unfortunately these people seems to be able to get enough loyalty and support to hold a lot of power.

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How do you choose your pair of eyeglasses?

English: A pair of reading glasses with LaCost...
English: A pair of reading glasses with LaCoste frames. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I stumbled upon an online store that sells eyeglasses and offers a freebie service to potential customers by finding the pair of eyeglasses which is best for your look through a series of questions you’ll answer.  It seemed that it is not enough to just choose eyeglasses with stainless frames because you like it.  One has to consider the face shape and also one’s life and fashion style in choosing the best pair of eyeglasses.

I did not know that.  I just go to my optometrist and choose glasses from the racks and look in the mirror if they fit and if they look good on me.  It was just that easy for me, not bothering to think if the pair of eyeglasses complements my face or my life and fashion style.  Well, maybe at the back of my mind, sometimes, I consider the color and the made if they can be used in most occasions.  That is one important thing to me, that the pair of eyeglasses can be used anytime, anywhere.  That is the most important part and the other, I must buy a pair that suits all occasions so that I will not have to buy another pair. For a tight budget, I would not need many.

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Will you still send daughter to school after getting pregnant?

Note:  This is one of my earliest topics in a discussion board that I transported to this blog.  I will be including the comments (but not my responses) of those who participated in the discussion.

Pregnancy - 39 weeks

A relative was devastated because her daughter got pregnant while still in college. She vowed that she will not let her go to school anymore. She was apprehensive that she might get pregnant again.

I told her that it will be beneficial for everybody that her daughter
goes back to school again after giving birth.

Will you heed my advice if something like this happens to you, as a
mother? And if you are a young teen or a young woman who committed such
mistake, are you going to pursue your studies and your dreams?

Comments:

From rhea_41084

Getting pregnant is not a hindrance to continue her studies, in fact she needs to study more not only for herself but for the benefit of her child.

From newbuzinez

yes i agree with you. i don’t think her daughter will commit the same mistake again after what she has been through.. she’ll learn from her mistakes anyway. there’s always a saying: fool me once , shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.. 🙂

From nightrose1981

Of course I would send her back. Because how can she have a future without the education to raise her child. I would do whatever it took to make sure my grandchild was cared for and that my child could afford the life a child needs. Only way to get that is to get an education so you can get a reasonable paying job.

From tbmomin

Why would she not send her daughter to college because she’s pregnant? To tell you the truth, I don’t agree with you either! She can still go to college even if she’s pregnant! I don’t think that just because she’s pregnant means everything that shes doing should be stopped. She can still go even before she gives birth to the baby. Tell your relative that she cannot make her to stop her education. She is gonna miss a year of her life by just staying at home doing nothing. People will eventually come to know about her situation, so why hide? she will have a baby to support, so she’ll have to try and stand on her own now. Im a young woman and I commited the same mistake while I was doing my PG. But that didnt stop me from pursuing my studies and dreams and now I have a respectable job and Im able to stand on my own and support my family. Im a good mother. I give time for my children and I never allowed my family matters to hamper my studies and never let my studies come between my family. Even my family members never left my side even though I let them down. Now Im married to the same guy, have two wonderful kids and don’t have any regrets! I think your relative will learn from my example.

From kristinad

i don’t understand why she can’t go to school while she is pregnant.it’s not like she is 15yr’s old at that age you are an adult and i think after she has the baby it is going to be hard for her to go back to school because who is going to watch the baby while she goes to school?

From pasttiger

It would be even more important for her to finish her education now. She has a baby to support. Why is she sure that she would get pregnant again. Does the daughter want to go back to school? Did she keep the baby? I would want my daughter to go back to school so she could get a good job to support the baby. I really thought that you were going to say that she was in high school. That is a big lesson to learn not just a quick thing to get over. So I wouldn’t think that she would do it again.

From fuxiadong

I agree with your advice.

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Can we call it premonition?

Still-Life with a Skull, vanitas painting.
Still-Life with a Skull, vanitas painting. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In an article, premonition is defined as a foreknowledge of an event that has not yet happened.  The article discusses about us being able to tell what is going to happen but has not happened yet, and that there are a lot of possibilities being broadcasted all the time.  Ms. Pavlina also said these are being brought to us by our spirit guides, or by a ‘time stream’.

I have encountered a lot of mention about premonition when death falls to a person.  During wakes, people will talk about ‘predictions’ mentioned by the dead person days before his or her death.  Take for example, Papsie’s cousin, Nilo, who made mention of words to his friend like “Huwag ka muna mamatay, ako muna mauuna.(Don’t die yet, I have to die first.)  He died days after.

I wondered if cousin Nilo knew about his impending death.  Did he utter those words unknowingly?  Because if he did know about it, he could have done something about it, and did everything to avoid his own death knowing his kids are still young and dependent on him.

Being obvious that he was not aware of the implications of his own words, can we call it premonition then?

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52Photos Project #6: Bright

52 Photos Project

When I encounter the word BRIGHT, what comes to mind immediately are bright smiles. Derived from a song, a smile is everlasting and can bring people to you. I have proven this a lot of times, a smile that I wear gives me back another sparkling smile. I believe that it makes the heart warm and it makes other people feel good.

“Being beautiful, doesn’t make you smile, doesn’t make you happy, doesn’t make you nice. Being nice and happy and always smiling makes you beautiful.” –
Levita Charin
“Smiling does not necessarily mean you’re happy. Sometimes it just means you’re strong.” – Nishan Panwar
“I was smiling yesterday,I am smiling today and I will smile tomorrow. Simply because life is too short to cry for anything.” – Ritu Gathourey
“I may smile bright. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not losing this fight. It doesn’t mean there’s no struggle within me. It doesn’t mean I’m everything I seem to be.”- author unknown
“A laugh is a smile that bursts.” – Mary H Waldrip

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And then there’s the wig

Will you ever consider wearing a wig, especially with types like these revlon wigs that really look natural or real hair?

Wigs
Wigs (Photo credit: modhousewife)

I might wear a wig someday. Who knows?  Just the other day son and I were talking about receding hair lines. He was wondering if he’s going to have a receding hair line someday.  I told him he will never know even if today he has thick hair.  Wearing a wig will not be an option, of course for him, or let a crater be seen on top of his head.  He emphatically said he will sport a bald look instead before parading with a ‘monk’s hair’ or a ‘shaggy’. 😀

In a party last year, I tried on a long wig and it really didn’t feel nice even if the wig looked natural.  It also felt uncomfortable perhaps because I haven’t experienced wearing one.  Perhaps the human hair wig will make a difference as they were said to be more natural looking.

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I need a body massage (maybe)

Massage in Frankfurt, Germany
Massage in Frankfurt, Germany (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Not one of those head and neck pillows could ease the nagging pain in my back, left portion.  Sometimes there is heaviness felt at the neck area, too.  These pillows are just preventive tools that protect the spine, provide comfortable sleep, support posture and distribute weight evenly, or provide fresh air circulation.  I am thinking that maybe because I am hypertensive that is why I am feeling these things but I have maintenance drugs making me skeptical about the relevance of the pain to hypertension, but I am not disregarding the possibility.

What I desire intently is a body massage, if possible, a full-body massage with concentration on the back and neck portion.  I heard that this can be done in spas.  I also read about Wensha Spa, a buffet and massage spa, located at Timog and Pasay.  We would probably visit the place one day.  It excites me to think about it – receiving a full-body massage and having buffet afterwards.  It is also a nice gift to someone dear.

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The Things You Have to Avoid When Drinking Alcohol

Drunkenness of Noah

This is in no particular order.  I will write what comes to mind.

Before I continue, I have to say this is inspired by some of my personal experiences.  Too much of everything is never helpful, and… healthy!  Remember the saying, too, – Too much of everything is a poison.

  • Do not open your Facebook account.  While inhibitions depart, you might, with the influence of alcohol, be tempted to post something unnecessary, scandalous, shameful,  or provocative, etc.  It will be too late to delete a post or a comment, which you might have found funny while writing it under the influence of alcohol, and regret doing it afterwards.
  • Do not drink outside your home or your comfort zone.  Drinking with peers might lead you to forget that you are far from home.  There is always a tendency to drink a lot of the alcohol or wine served when the storytelling get funny or while you all trod along memory lane.  There is also danger of blurting out words that you might regret saying afterwards when intoxication waned.  It is not a good feeling to seem like a ninny.
  • Do not drink with people you loathe.  One way or another, you will find the time to confront the person with his or her ill manners, or bad attitude, or bad deeds.  If you will be able to control yourself, you might, on the other hand, be the one affected as you will be stressed out trying to appear everything is okay, or show you are okay even if you are not.
  • Do not drink beyond what you can.  Chances are you’ll stumble, roll on the ground, vomit (yaikkks!!), be the object of ridicule because of your silly talks and manners during your drunken state, get very ill in the following morning/day, etc.
  • Do not bring a lot of cash.  People who are drunk, especially men, tend to get very generous in giving out money, especially when they are in the company of floozies.  I remember someone who got very drunk and showed his money (almost fifty T), and was wondering the next morning where all the money went.
  • Do not argue with anyone.  As long as you can avoid arguments, do avoid.  This will turn into fights, or melees, later on.  Talk about happy things.  Anyway, you drink for fun, for friendship, for celebrations.

There, this is my current list of dont’s when one is drinking with his or her peers.  I may have more to add upon discovery.  😀  This means this will be updated if there are more observations to gather. Or, if you have something in mind, you might want to share.

 

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Anti-obesity Online

You may want to visit http://www.shoppharmacycounter.com/t-phentermine.aspx to find out more about phentermine.  The weight loss industry is growing.  Does that mean that a lot of people are growing obese? Most probably.  The industry is building up where even online, the number of stores are growing.  One has to be careful still, I believe, as there are possibilities that crooks will sell fake products.

The Daily Pills
The Daily Pills (Photo credit: SCA Scot)

I am not into taking drugs to suppress weight.  I am always an advocate of exercise and healthy diet but there are individuals who just do not have the time, and interest to exert effort.  I do not justify but perhaps taking pills and all to suppress weight gain and obesity works for them.

If you are one of them then visiting an anti-obesity store can be an option as this is faster, convenient and private. 😀

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Psycho

MANGGIS, BALI, INDONESIA-MAY 8 : Ketut, 33, si...
MANGGIS, BALI, INDONESIA-MAY 8 : Ketut, 33, sits in his room where he lives, chained for the past eight years May 8, 2012 in Manggis, Bali, Indonesia. Ketut is shackled by his own family in order to control him. They say that he has shown signs of a mental disorder for nine years but only took him to a ‘ Balian’ which is a Balinese traditional healer. Currently, he is monitored by the Suryani Institute for Mental Health, a non-profit institute that cares for the mentally ill providing free medical and psychiatric treatment. The mental health institute works to get all of their patients released but in some cases the family creates more problems. Many poor families don’t have money to pay for hospitalization or go to a doctor. Inside the spiritual Balinese society there is often a stigma and misinformation about mental illness. Some people feel that this is the work of the supernatural so their hope to solve the mental disorder is to let the traditional healer do his work. Bali has one government run mental hospital. Indonesia has a population of approximately 240 million people, the country has a shortage of psychiatrists and the health ministry spends 2.3 percent of the total national budget on health care. (Image credit: Getty Images via @daylife)

During lunch again at the company’s canteen, the topic was about the Canadian psycho whose victim’s head was already found.  The victim was a Chinese national.

I told my buddies that even here in the Philippines, the number of individuals with mental illnesses are growing.  C* mentioned that the government has to give more attention to the mental health of the Filipinos other than the physical health.  Mental health, according to him, influences the physical health of a person. To that I agree.

The discussion shifted to the early symptoms of depression.  It continued when  C* mentioned one symptom when a person cries alone.  F* interjected that she was crying alone when she was in high school. I asked C* if he also cried alone and he replied that he didn’t but instead laughed alone.

Now, the question is, I continued, who is more mentally ill – a person that cries or laughs alone?  C* promptly answered it is the person who cries alone to which F* disagreed.  😀

R* butted in and said that the person who cries alone has a lot of unhappy moments.  F* contradicted saying that it is the one who laughs alone that has sad memories because he or she is laughing at misfortunes while the one who cries alone remembers the beautiful memories and regrets  that they had slipped away. 😀

Now, what do you think of this? Do you cry or laugh alone, and why?

As for me, I laugh alone more when I remember the funny things in this life.  It is my way of laughing at my own mistakes that help me thrive, I guess.

 

 

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Under the blistering heat?

Sunken Garden of University of the Philippines...
Sunken Garden of University of the Philippines Diliman (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If not for the beloved son’s wish, we will not attend UP Diliman‘s graduation because of what I heard that it would be celebrated at the space at the back of the Oblation statue. I do not remember what that area is called.  True to what I heard, the ceremony was held under the blistering heat of the sun.  There was no cover or structure that will cover the graduates and the parents.

Son said it was tradition, and I hate the fact that it’s one of the reasons.  Not because it’s tradition, it can’t be changed.  There has to be something done about it.  There are possibilities of  mishaps involving stroke/heat stroke, heart attack, asthma, and other related illnesses that could be triggered by the intense heat.

It’s a good thing there is an alternative to the toga.  The sablay made it easier for the students to withstand the heat.  I could not imagine them being under the blistering heat of the sun with the toga on. With only the unique sablay, that signifies that one is a graduate, is indeed a relief from the torture.

It’s also a good thing that the ceremony that was conducted was faster.  There is nothing in it that required the students to pile before receiving the diploma.  It’s as simple as presenting the graduating classes/students in a department, the honor students and the graduates.  It’s simple but it is more grand than the usual procedure.

The Mighty Sun yesterday was in a good mood though. He did not unleash its fiery rays all throughout the ceremony.  There were instances that he hid and acted like he was just observing beneath the clouds and peeked only from time to time wanting to engage in moments of joy. The trees around the area gave shades and comfort.  When the Mighty Sun was hiding, the trees were swaying and the air was dancing. It gave us moments of rest from the almost non-stop fanning using the woven pamaypay.

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I am a parent, and here’s some thoughts

It’s not only children who grow.  Parents do too.  As much as we watch to see what our children do with their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours.  I can’t tell my children to reach for the sun.  All I can do is reach for it, myself.  ~Joyce Maynard

Child 1
Child 1 (Photo credit: Tony Tr?n)

I have to admit I also grew up while they were growing up.  My children were trained to be independent-minded, as free-thinkers, as freedom lovers, as realists,  as justice sympathizers, and to be individuals upholding integrity, dedication and truth.

It is not easy for one parent to be a parent with children that know their rights fully well, that stand on what they believe in, that are not swayed or influenced easily, and that have minds of their own. I tell you it was, and it is, not easy.

Along the way, Papsie and I have learned a lot from this journey.  It is very true that as we live, we learn.  It is an unending journey of learning.  With it comes acceptance of your own misgivings and your own weaknesses as parents.  We learned to accept the unacceptable.  Translate: we become more understanding individuals.

While Papsie and I wilt with old age and illnesses, we are confident though that they will be able to carry on life, and perhaps be better than how we tried to live it, even without us around. In fact, they are already better than how we tried reaching the sun.

The truth of the matter is, there were many rough roads before we managed to realize how important each of us is to one another.  We had developed this bond so strong that it was what kept us getting on.  We were complete, no one was absent in tempering the ties. Everybody in our household cooperated, and I believe it will be stronger.

I am simply happy today. 😀  I realized Papsie and I succeeded even if our roles in our children’s lives are just secondary fiddle it may seem.  I believe we were successful in imparting the vital ingredients in life.

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