Musings on a Hot Afternoon

There was this younger mother telling her son about the ‘sexiness’ of an older woman. The three-almost-four year old only stared at the older woman probably confused.  The older woman thought it was a compliment until the mother of the young boy said,  “He is a conservative boy, you know, he does not like seeing women with short dresses and blouses exposing flesh.”  The older woman became suddenly aware that her blouse, which is a petite black blouse, probably is exposing a little flesh.  The get-up was not at all scandalous and inappropriate to the woman’s age, it was just a normal weekend apparel.  What harm could a pair of cargo pants and petite blouse do to a boy of three and a half?  The older woman asked in return, “How old are you, little boy?” The boy gestured three.  “Do you know the word conservative?”  The boy gave her a confused look again.  Then the mother suddenly told the son that the older woman is sexy because her tummy is showing.  The boy giggled innocently, not saying anything bad but “Your pants is falling!”

I just couldn’t get this scenario off my mind.  Parents are responsible in the molding of young minds.  What children become is a large chunk of thoughts, ideas, concepts, etc. coming from their parents.  It makes me sad how some parents can thwart young and innocent minds.  It makes me wonder still how I fared when the children were still young.

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English: Manny Pacquiao, LA right before the M...
English: Manny Pacquiao, LA right before the Marco Antonio Barrera fight. (original text) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

An exchange of thoughts about Manny losing with a FB friend transpired.  In his line of thoughts he mentioned “God chose Bradley to win” plus another line that says “It is time for Manny to pause and realize he had to be serious with God now than in boxing. Otherwise, he will get seriously hurt.”

I do not intend to question God because it is not like I heard God saying “I chose Bradley to win”.  It is one of another man’s interpretation of the situation because of Pacquiao’s claim being spiritual or close to God.  I said my piece telling “I just couldn’t understand God allowing such a win for Bradley when it’s obvious for many that it was Pacquiao who won…. I could understand it if he truly lose, I mean, knocked out to the ground, received more hard blows”.

At times, it is not easy dealing with thoughts that God can allow bad things to happen for one person to learn of God and his precepts.  I could understand though an individual receiving hard blows in life because he had done things not in accordance to God’s law as punishment, or reprimand.  Am I making my point here?

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Just a while ago, two young boys were fist fighting, the smaller one more brave than the bigger one.  The bigger boy was a son of a house tenant who was currently playing mah jong.  It caught me and my daughter’s attention when he was yelling and coaxing his son to give a punch.  We hurried outside and saw that his son was actually receiving all the blows.  I was worried and was telling Papsie to let the melee stop and he replied they do not want to stop.  I yelled at the little boy to stop but the father of the bigger boy was yelling not to stop them and he was like infuriated that his son was not giving a fight. Weird father.  I can see the makings of a gangster, or a future delinquent.

Kay approached the smaller boy and told him to go home.  He looked like he was about to go to a fight any minute again but he obliged and went away but the bigger boy suddenly wanted to give a blow and Kay was stopping and asking Papsie to stop the boys.  The bigger boy suddenly became brave. It was a case of “lalong nanggigil habang pinipigil”.  He must have misinterpreted Kay’s rescue.

Society has this mercenary culture in producing villains, bandits, or criminals.

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What Comes Out of the Mouth

Take note of the title. A lot of us do not think of what comes out of our mouth if it hurts or not, or if it will affect the recipient or the listener.

Not all recipients or listeners will just let some biting words get in the way that intends to insult or hurt other’s feelings. Not every listener will keep silent. What makes a situation complicated is when the recipient or the listener will retaliate or get square with words, too, which is much more stronger or biting. Are they to be blamed?

It is true that acceptance depends on a person, even the acceptance of words from other people. It is also true that we should not bear grudges against these tactless people. We should always practice patience and probably forgiveness. But still, we have to be responsible of what comes out of our mouth. We should always check ourselves by asking:

  • What is the right way to converse?
  • Who is this person we are talking to?
  • What are we talking about? Is this serious stuff or not?
  • How do I go against what the person is saying without offending?
  • How do I praise her or him without exaggerating?
I have met a lot of people, and that required me to socialize with them. These included professional people but profession is not enough when a person has no manners or good traits.

Let’s take for example observing someone who has ‘real appetite’. It maybe more polite to say “You love eating” than saying “You are a glutton”. Also, let’s take a situation where an office mate shows a picture of her daughter. How will she take the question, “Why does she have a long chin?” How will she answer the ‘why’? Must she answer “I don’t know,” or “Because my husband has a long chin”? That is such a meaningless question and that would stop her from lovingly telling more stories about her beloved daughter.

Again, let us look at this situation in the office. An employee bought a new pair of shoes. One of the office mates noticed the new pair of shoes and remarked, “What a lovely pair of shoes but your feet do not look pretty on your shoes.” How should one react to such a statement?

The day becomes beautiful when what comes out of the mouth is positive. There maybe instances that what comes out of the mouth is negative but unavoidable circumstances are very different from deliberately saying things that will cause harm or will badly affect a person.

Indebtedness


It was after dinner one night when we heard the news on television about a jobless Filipina maid in Hongkong who returned 2.1 M worth of money. A part of a news report tells:

But on April 29, Perez found something that could have ended her misfortunes.

After renewing her visa at the immigration department, she noticed a thick packet just slightly bigger than an airmail envelope, in a trash bin on the corner of Pottinger Street and Des Voeux Road.

Perez picked it up and handed it to her companion, a man identified only as David, who opened the packet. Inside were cash and checks amounting to HK$350,545 (P2.1 million).

There was $176,000 in cash (in denomination of $1,000) and four checks: one for US$13,000, another for US$5,000, a third for US$3,250, and another for HK$10,920.

Mildred Perez is a 38 year old Filipina who was working in Hongkong when a tragedy befell her – she was sexually assaulted by her employer. She was banned from working in Hongkong because she became the complainant.

What enraged Papsie (my husband) was this news:

Tsang and Kitty gave Perez a can of butter cookies as a token of gratitude…

Which was my initial reaction, too, but felt later some reservation about the issue. I shrugged the thought and decided there must be a reason why it was only a can of butter cookies was given to Perez.

The Reason Why Papsie Got Mad

For Papsie, the person(s) who lost the money has lost it already and it is ingratitude for him not to acknowledge the goodness of Perez in a way that will truly give her a good deal in return to what she had selflessly done. Actually, I am just sugarcoating. Papsie was enraged and ‘cursed’ Kitty and Tsang. He was so affected he was speaking his sentiments in a loud voice.

Kay was Enraged, Too

Not because of the can of cookies but because of Papsie’s reaction. She believes it is not an obligation to pay or give back something for a good deed. She hates the thought of judging other people because they failed to pay a good deed. Papsie failed to understand her point of view that we should always reserve a space for understanding. There must always be an extension for ‘what-ifs’.

Thoughts to Ponder

  • The Culture. The Filipino culture includes beliefs that good deeds have to be repaid. It is this indebtedness that Filipinos are obligated to pay somehow all the time what was graciously done. This misconception that one is indebted forever because of one good deed puts Filipinos in awkward situations most of the time.
  • The Tendency to Make Judgments Easily. One bad trait that can be common among Filipinos is the ease of making judgments easily. It is this tendency to pass judgment without considerations that always put Filipinos in bad light.
  • Identifying with Others. This may not be an exclusive character for Filipinos but sometimes it is mostly seen that they extend themselves to others, or they attribute some characters as their own.

Have you at one point or some points in your life taken something that does not belong to you? Have you returned it when there was a chance?

Indebtedness


It was after dinner one night when we heard the news on television about a jobless Filipina maid in Hongkong who returned 2.1 M worth of money. A part of a news report tells:

But on April 29, Perez found something that could have ended her misfortunes.

After renewing her visa at the immigration department, she noticed a thick packet just slightly bigger than an airmail envelope, in a trash bin on the corner of Pottinger Street and Des Voeux Road.

Perez picked it up and handed it to her companion, a man identified only as David, who opened the packet. Inside were cash and checks amounting to HK$350,545 (P2.1 million).

There was $176,000 in cash (in denomination of $1,000) and four checks: one for US$13,000, another for US$5,000, a third for US$3,250, and another for HK$10,920.

Mildred Perez is a 38 year old Filipina who was working in Hongkong when a tragedy befell her – she was sexually assaulted by her employer. She was banned from working in Hongkong because she became the complainant.

What enraged Papsie (my husband) was this news:

Tsang and Kitty gave Perez a can of butter cookies as a token of gratitude…

Which was my initial reaction, too, but felt later some reservation about the issue. I shrugged the thought and decided there must be a reason why it was only a can of butter cookies was given to Perez.

The Reason Why Papsie Got Mad

For Papsie, the person(s) who lost the money has lost it already and it is ingratitude for him not to acknowledge the goodness of Perez in a way that will truly give her a good deal in return to what she had selflessly done. Actually, I am just sugarcoating. Papsie was enraged and ‘cursed’ Kitty and Tsang. He was so affected he was speaking his sentiments in a loud voice.

Kay was Enraged, Too

Not because of the can of cookies but because of Papsie’s reaction. She believes it is not an obligation to pay or give back something for a good deed. She hates the thought of judging other people because they failed to pay a good deed. Papsie failed to understand her point of view that we should always reserve a space for understanding. There must always be an extension for ‘what-ifs’.

Thoughts to Ponder

  • The Culture. The Filipino culture includes beliefs that good deeds have to be repaid. It is this indebtedness that Filipinos are obligated to pay somehow all the time what was graciously done. This misconception that one is indebted forever because of one good deed puts Filipinos in awkward situations most of the time.
  • The Tendency to Make Judgments Easily. One bad trait that can be common among Filipinos is the ease of making judgments easily. It is this tendency to pass judgment without considerations that always put Filipinos in bad light.
  • Identifying with Others. This may not be an exclusive character for Filipinos but sometimes it is mostly seen that they extend themselves to others, or they attribute some characters as their own.

Have you at one point or some points in your life taken something that does not belong to you? Have you returned it when there was a chance?

Indebtedness


It was after dinner one night when we heard the news on television about a jobless Filipina maid in Hongkong who returned 2.1 M worth of money. A part of a news report tells:

But on April 29, Perez found something that could have ended her misfortunes.

After renewing her visa at the immigration department, she noticed a thick packet just slightly bigger than an airmail envelope, in a trash bin on the corner of Pottinger Street and Des Voeux Road.

Perez picked it up and handed it to her companion, a man identified only as David, who opened the packet. Inside were cash and checks amounting to HK$350,545 (P2.1 million).

There was $176,000 in cash (in denomination of $1,000) and four checks: one for US$13,000, another for US$5,000, a third for US$3,250, and another for HK$10,920.

Mildred Perez is a 38 year old Filipina who was working in Hongkong when a tragedy befell her – she was sexually assaulted by her employer. She was banned from working in Hongkong because she became the complainant.

What enraged Papsie (my husband) was this news:

Tsang and Kitty gave Perez a can of butter cookies as a token of gratitude…

Which was my initial reaction, too, but felt later some reservation about the issue. I shrugged the thought and decided there must be a reason why it was only a can of butter cookies was given to Perez.

The Reason Why Papsie Got Mad

For Papsie, the person(s) who lost the money has lost it already and it is ingratitude for him not to acknowledge the goodness of Perez in a way that will truly give her a good deal in return to what she had selflessly done. Actually, I am just sugarcoating. Papsie was enraged and ‘cursed’ Kitty and Tsang. He was so affected he was speaking his sentiments in a loud voice.

Kay was Enraged, Too

Not because of the can of cookies but because of Papsie’s reaction. She believes it is not an obligation to pay or give back something for a good deed. She hates the thought of judging other people because they failed to pay a good deed. Papsie failed to understand her point of view that we should always reserve a space for understanding. There must always be an extension for ‘what-ifs’.

Thoughts to Ponder

  • The Culture. The Filipino culture includes beliefs that good deeds have to be repaid. It is this indebtedness that Filipinos are obligated to pay somehow all the time what was graciously done. This misconception that one is indebted forever because of one good deed puts Filipinos in awkward situations most of the time.
  • The Tendency to Make Judgments Easily. One bad trait that can be common among Filipinos is the ease of making judgments easily. It is this tendency to pass judgment without considerations that always put Filipinos in bad light.
  • Identifying with Others. This may not be an exclusive character for Filipinos but sometimes it is mostly seen that they extend themselves to others, or they attribute some characters as their own.

Have you at one point or some points in your life taken something that does not belong to you? Have you returned it when there was a chance?