Jealousy in Children: Adults Need to Learn More

I am inclined to believe that adults somehow cause the jealousy that children feel.  After all, children learn from adults and they’re like sponges, taking in the good and bad, acting like their attention is on something but actually listening, observing, and drawing in everything that catches their attention.

jealousy-fighting
Photo from Saida Online

I bought a gift for a little child that my husband is so fond of for one of those holiday gatherings.  I had difficulty choosing a toy because my children, as I have mentioned in a previous post, do not want to give toy guns as gifts.  The little child loves cars, but he also has many toy cars already.

A big red car caught my attention, not knowing at first that it was a remote-controlled car.  The sales lady explained everything to me in detail including how one button will automatically open the doors.  I got so fascinated with the idea that the little child will be amazed of the gift that after her powerful sales talk, I was persuaded to buy.  I did not doubt that my husband will be disappointed.

Continue reading “Jealousy in Children: Adults Need to Learn More”

The Word Liminal and the Toy Gun

The boy above is Drey. He’s my husband’s regular morning visitor, the reason why he had gotten so fond of this little 3-year-old boy.

One day, he told me to buy a toy gun for Drey. I am so forgetful that I haven’t got a chance to buy one. When the daughter came to visit, my husband asked her to buy a toy gun for the little boy but my daughter refused. My grown-up children believe that toy guns are not the right toys for kids. Continue reading “The Word Liminal and the Toy Gun”

Nothing but a second rate, trying hard copycat!

The prompt reminds me of an acclaimed Filipino movie released in 1985 – Bituing Walang Ningning -, which translates to ‘star without luster’.  It was in this movie where one of those memorable lines was delivered by the supporting actress – “You’re nothing but a second-rate, trying hard copycat!”  Nothing beats controversial lines like that in movies.

cheriegilline484
photo from spot.ph

The versatile actress named Cherie Gil who played as a famous singer threatened by a newcomer in the industry was very effective in her role.  That kind where you almost hate her for being so vile in her realistic role. Continue reading “Nothing but a second rate, trying hard copycat!”

Would you give away your child after birth upon learning about the birth defect?

English: “This newborn is displaying the birth defect known as [:w:Polydactylia|Polydactylia] involving both feet.” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
As others had opined, this is truly a tough question and scary to think about.

As an able mother, meaning one that has all the resources and readiness to take care of a child, giving a child with a birth defect is not an option. The child did not ask to be born. It is not even his or her fault to be with defect so why would a mother give away a child? A mother should love without conditions and that is the essence of it all.

Continue reading “Would you give away your child after birth upon learning about the birth defect?”

Which year would you choose to live life over again, if given the chance?

Wonderful Life (1964 film)
Wonderful Life (1964 film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

That is one question I read that had me thinking. I’d choose 1983. Why? That is when I felt true love the first time. That is when I felt I couldn’t breathe because of excitement. That is when I had my first kiss that sent shivers all over me. That is when I felt confident that I am lovable and huggable.

Truly, a lot of things happened during that year. Alongside the exhilaration, it was also the year my father got very ill. It gave me that heavy, huge feeling of responsibility on my shoulder. But I tried to be strong. I guess it was what made me strong all along.

Which year would you choose to live life over again?

———

This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore.  The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.

From EstiiBabii

I think I would chose to live 1999 all over again, even though I was a
child back then I enjoyed life during those years. I had many friends, I
was had many toys, I’d always played with my friends in the park. I
remember always going to the park during the summer time and having my
water guns in gear and running around trying to wet my friends and them
trying to wet me. I remember how much fun it was that year, I would love
to live that year once again.

From hardworkinggurl

Hi bingskee

1987 & 1989 the two years I had both of my kids. I would give
anything to have them tiny again. Though life has been sweet during
their growing years, I wold love to have those two wonderful and
memorable days once again.

I personally would not do anything different about the years as I would
not have had such a wonderful life with my two kids. Sure their ups and
downs but remembering I was their mommy and that they were my babies
made it all worthwhile for me. I actually would not change a single
thing as I want to remember all of it as is.

From thesids

Hi GF 1987 & 1989 the two years I had both of my kids

And in 1989 I passed out class 10th… Gosh!

 

Dear Ms. Bingskee

Well, 3!

anything between 1976 to 1985 on the first one. My late grandmother me
and my late grandfather really were a family and I can do anything to
get back to those days.

Then, 1989-1994 – any one for the second. College days. No study and all
the activity that I did staying in and away from the college.

And then, 1998-200 anyone for the third. Best part of my life as far as
career was concerned.

Any one of the above would be great. Tell me when do I arrive to get
into the time machine

From miadsoriano

It’s not just a year that I’m interested in. It’s for the whole time
that Jose Rizal lived on this Earth. If I can browse-fastforward through
his whole life, from the time he was born, and until his execution,
then I think I will be happy.

I’m really curious as to his vast knowledge, his education, his travels,
how he got into linguistics, his whole personality. Would like to
really find out how charming he was then. How mysterious. Everything.
And if I can take someone with me on this journey, it would definitely
be my husband, who has the same level of curiosity when the subject
matter is Rizal. 🙂

From dorannmwin

I think that I will chose 1999. The reason that I would chose that year
is because it was the year of my life that I really started to make good
friends when I was in college. In addition to that, it was also the
year that I fell in love for the first time. I will admit that the
relationship that I had during that time didn’t turn out well, but to go
through it again would be a great thing for me because things would be
different knowing then what I know now.

From Jlyn10

If I tell you, would you take me back in time?

I would choose the year 1979 cause I was still small and just love being
pampered by my family members. It was a great time for everyone back
then.

I also would choose the year 2000 as that was the time when my son was
born. I just love the time spent with him, just looking at him while he
sleeps. I want to him see grow up again from the start.

From toniganzon

I would choose to live in the 80s again when i was just a child of
tender years with my parents both still alive and taking care of us. I
really missed them a lot. I don’t like the 90s coz they got murdered in
1991.

From vandana7

I would choose 1963. My mom was alive then. I would want to be with her
once more. From what I have known her now, I just want to go back there,
and appreciate her, and love her, and make her feel loved and
understood.

From ladydulce

None! I’m more excited for the years I have coming. I can relive the
others as much as I want in memory, but I wouldn’t trade watching my son
grow to be a man and starting his own family or learning what’s in
store for me. Too cool to go back.

From LittleMel

it would be 2009. very meaningful and rejuvenating year.
as if all doors were opened for me, starting from improvement of
spiritual life
that leads to major change in my perspectives and life decisions
change inward manifests outward, I have actually found like-minded
trustworthy friends and teachers in the same year and they contribute to
more exhilarating changes in me
there is no year like 2009 to me. at least not yet.

From wongchoiyee

80s to early 90s
That’s when everything is so good, money was never a problem, I get
along with my brother whom now moved out, my mom and dad pampered me,
and lots of friends, good friends. But now we have graduated we lost
touch but once again I looked forward to future because I want myself to
find a true love and get married.

From peach786

2004 definitely! that’s when i had my 1st heart attack only 2 weeks
before my son’s wedding. Can’t get any close call than that! Wife was
called from my office to head to the hospital dropping all her chores.
All family members were assembled, and the in-laws left in limbo.
Hospital got the wind that my presence was very essential at the pre-wed
preparations so the doctors prioterised my angioplasty, put couple of
stents inside my arteries the same evening, gave me a light supper and a
cup of tea and turned off the lights for the night. i was home the next
day, and we all had our first and best family wedding ever!

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Why "Pusong Bato" Became a Monster Hit

I remember Yoyoy Villame saying that if a novelty song can be sung by even the little children and the young teenagers, then it’s going to be a hit.  Even without them understanding lyrics, if the song clicked with the young surely it will become popular.

Just how singer Yoyoy described it, the Pusong Bato became a hit because the young generation was able to sing it, and with gusto.  Or does the tune have something to do with it?

Here is a version by Renee Alon de la Rosa:

 

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Will You Choose to Know a Secret?

Well Kept Secret
Well Kept Secret (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

It depends on what secret I have to know. If someone will ask me if I am interested to know her beauty secret then I will oblige. If somebody will tell me where the bullions of gold were kept by the Japanese, I would desire to know this secret.

Kidding aside, somebody hinted that she has something to tell me. With already a guess that what I will be listening to is about a forbidden affair. I politely declined. Unless the person wanted to ask my advice then I would gladly solicit but if it is for purposes of just letting me know, what for? It is actually a dangerous thing to know a delicate issue which is supposedly a secret that the individual that has to know it is only the person himself and not anybody else. Why would I involve myself and stress myself when I have enough worries of my own? Why would I strive to know these matters? Sadly, some people are more interested in talking about other people and their mishaps, and travails, and misfortunes. I do not know if this ease their own sorrows. 🙂

What about you? Would you want to know a secret?

———-

This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore.  The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.

From inertia4

I would not be interested in knowing a secret either. Unless it directly involved me. I know for a fact now, that back when my ex was planning on leaving me, my aunt knew about it and never told me a thing. I believe she should have told me. That directly involved me. But if it were about someone else I would not want to know.

From jeanneyvonne

I guess I will be the same as you. There are some things that are exciting to share and there are somethings we really want to keep within us. Some secrets are deadly and sometimes, some are so burdensome that they cannot keep it within themselves. As a friend, sometimes I also get weary of hearing their problems rather them hearing them about mine. They seem to think that I have no problems of my own because I keep to myself and I don’;’t bother people with them. I am also contend on what my friends tell me even with secrets as long as they aren’t going to included me with it. I think some people deserve their privacy and self-respect. If they don’t want to blurt it out, it’s fine with me.

from greenwbird

It is a very dangerous thing to know others’ secret,especially when it combins to their privacy.the owner may tell his/her secret to several other persons except you ,but once the privacy disclose,everyone who knows the thing will have trouble,suspicion will stress all of you so much.so when someone wants to tell you some secret,just have enough consideration before opening your ear.

from enelym001

Sometimes I would like to know a delicate secret…and sometimes not. Sometimes I don’t have a choice specially if it’s a best friend who tells me a secret. But yes I have to agree with you that it stressed me out. Sometimes I wished I haven’t known such thing coz I feel like I am already involved. No matter how I try to encourage the person I still feel I have no right to tell the friend what to do- coz it is their life and they are the one to decide about their life.

from TheRealDawn

maybe to help the other person? idk

from sjvg1976

Hello bingskee, I agree! Sometimes there are secrets which i would definitely like to know but there are some secrets too which i won’t like to know unnecessarily stressing my mind.There are people though who always remain interested to know secrets about others as they need something to gossip around which in my opinion is really bad and they should avoid it.

from dorothy172

I agree with what you said, it just depend on what secret is that? If it is a secret to success, i think i would like to know about it, because it is a way of self development. But if it is a secret of somebody else, i am not interesrted with it. Since i cant guarantee i can keep the secret for he or she. So better not to know about it.

from sexybeast

i know of some people who live for gossip. they couldn’t resist knowing juicy tidbits. they even beg the other person to tell it to them, pretending they could help but offer advice. sad, really! i can keep a secret (bragging aside). i’ve proven it myself. will i choose to? hmmmm… depends if he/she really wants to tell me and if i can help him/her.

from smacksman

I think the worst is when a friend talks to you about something personal and then at the end says ‘Please keep to to yourself’ or ‘Please keep this secret’. Now you have no choice because you have already been told the secret! You have no choice whether to accept the secret or not! While I keep all secrets given to me I know that some do not. Now this person that told you a secret finds out that the secret is out – it is no longer a secret. Now I know that I did not reveal his secret but does he know that? ! I know that he must have told his secret to at least one other person or that the secret has been exposed by some other event, maybe by chance. Whatever the reason, it still leaves an element of suspision between friends. Not good.

from grasyia

It all depends on what secret. If it’s too personal i think I wouldn’t want to know.

from uggonen

It really depends on who the other person is. If its some good friend of mine then maybe yes but if its some random person on the street then no thank you.

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How do you choose your pair of eyeglasses?

English: A pair of reading glasses with LaCost...
English: A pair of reading glasses with LaCoste frames. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I stumbled upon an online store that sells eyeglasses and offers a freebie service to potential customers by finding the pair of eyeglasses which is best for your look through a series of questions you’ll answer.  It seemed that it is not enough to just choose eyeglasses with stainless frames because you like it.  One has to consider the face shape and also one’s life and fashion style in choosing the best pair of eyeglasses.

I did not know that.  I just go to my optometrist and choose glasses from the racks and look in the mirror if they fit and if they look good on me.  It was just that easy for me, not bothering to think if the pair of eyeglasses complements my face or my life and fashion style.  Well, maybe at the back of my mind, sometimes, I consider the color and the made if they can be used in most occasions.  That is one important thing to me, that the pair of eyeglasses can be used anytime, anywhere.  That is the most important part and the other, I must buy a pair that suits all occasions so that I will not have to buy another pair. For a tight budget, I would not need many.

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If given a super power, would you consider having the ability to read minds?

Telepathy
Telepathy (Photo credit: Daniela Vladimirova)

Telekinesis and telepathy are interesting abilities. They are very tempting capabilities if someone will be given them even for once. This morning my son asked me this question, “Would you love to have the ability to read minds or to know another’s thoughts?” He continued, “Because given its disadvantages, I consider it a very nice idea to have that super power!” I replied that I would have that but with an exemption. “And what is that?” he asked. I answered, “I would love to read other people’s thoughts but I would not have it with my loved ones. It would pain me to know the negative thoughts they have against me or against other people. It is even scary.” “Really? That’s odd.” he quipped.

Would you try having the ability to read minds even for a day? What super power will you prefer, if not the ability to know other people’s thoughts?

——-

This is from a discussion board I joined before where I am not active anymore.  The comments below were also from those people in that discussion board.

From inertia4

Although having the ability to read minds is a cool idea, I don’t know if I would want that responsibility. You see, if you were able to read peoples minds, I believe it would create extreme anxiety and stress within you. It would also create hatred towards people, at least the ones that think bad of you. I have a pretty good idea what people think of me already. So, having that power, in my opinion would be more harmful then helpful.

From inertia4

I think even if it were for only an hour could drastically alter the person forever. You will forever be wondering what people are saying about you sand your loved ones. It will drive you crazy. Thats what I think anyway.

From sunli123

I don’t want the ability to read other people’s thought or heart. I think it is terrible. Everyone has secrets, which need to be respected, no matted what it is. Also, there’s an old saying in China, if the water is too clear, no fish, if people detect too much, no friends.

From airkulet

You are right sunli, also this reading mind is like a wire tapping that can lead you in danger, I hope it doesn’t really exist or if there are people who claimed to be like that, hoping that they wont read everything. For sure that I will always change my thinking from time to time or maybe becoming too paranoid just to prevent someone to read it!

From thesids

Dear Ms. bingskee No, I will not opt with that one. it is quite a deadly weapon to have in ones arsenal. All it is going to do is hurt me – because I am quite sure many have negative opinions about me and until I read their minds, these things are away from me… and we are having a better relation. I do not think it will be good for me and the relationships. Instead, how about the superpower to become invisible? I can always think of something good if that comes for a day or two. Maybe rob a bank or the hoarded money from some bad people and transfering them to the poor, myself and a few more needy? Nah, doesnt sound that good. I think I will remain undecided and miss the opportunity Is it because I never want to be famous or a well known personality?

From Jlyn10

No, I wouldn’t want that kind of ability. What if I could do that and I suddenly found out all their needs and wants and as much as I want to help, there are some things that I won’t be able to help? I’d be feeling guilty all my life for not being able to lend a helping hand.

From deer04

In this morning in my work, Ive been thinking to discuss about super natural power or asking if you given a chance to have an extra ordinary power what it would be? but then as you create this discussion i would like to share my idea about this. As i remember, last last year, i try to search in the internet what and how to learned the Telekinesis and Telepathy because i wanted to learned and have that talent. and then in youtube there’s a lot of video that you can watch and they teach you about that two abilities and the different of that two. And nothing it happens to me, i try but im only wasting my time to try that. but also, i amaze about that abilities. I know some people in this world has have that abilities to do so. As i search to the internet, Telepathy is a direct transference of thought from one person to another without using the usual sensory channel of communication. What if all people knows to used this abilities, maybe using the Telepathy maybe the replacement of using cellphone to communicate other people far away from us.

From miadsoriano

I would like to have the power to travel back in time – to see the birth of Christ, see the highlights of Dr. Jose Rizal’s life, see how the Philippines was during the time of the Americans, see how my parents grew up. Just simply “see” and not interfere with anything. It’s either that, or have the power to travel ANYWHERE with just the snap of my fingers; or become invisible whenever I want so I can board a plane or cruise ship and travel ANYWHERE. No passports. No entry Visas. Sigh!

From dorannmwin

I really don’t think that I would like to have the ability to read the minds of other people. Instead, I think that it would be fun to be invisible. The reason that I think that would be very interesting would be because of the fact that you could hear entire discussions that you would not be able to hear otherwise and you also wouldn’t have so many voices that could be rivalling against each other in your day to day life.

From hardworkinggurl

Oh my I would be afraid to have such a power and even for a day. There are some things I rather not know. I find that being able to read minds would make for way too much confusion in my life. I am already confused at times as it is and knowing that I could read minds would cause me to read way more then I should. I pay close attention to smallest of details so being able to read a person’s mind will cause me to delve into a dangerous area. Some things are better found out on their own.

From april_dawn

It would be so nice if you have the super power to read minds of other people but the bad thing is,it’s like you are invading their privacy because you would be able to know what they feel,what their plans are and what other things they have in their mind that should be for private only.%-)

From airkulet

Well if it is free and doesn’t want anything in return why not. But thinking of it is also kinda scary too. Our private thought will be read by someone and I can’t imagine how will I hide it from that person who has the ability to read of it.

From jeanneyvonne

Tricky one. I have been wishing I have mind-reading powers because I cannot understand the point of view of the people (loved ones included) around. I could understand but always to a certain extent and sometimes, I don’t understand the motive or reason of other people. However, I also see the point of others – that as individuals, we already have our own problems. Peeking into other people’s mind can be considered as an invasion or privacy. Perhaps people should be at least a little be open with what’s going on their heads in order for them to be more understood by the people around them.

From toniganzon

It sounds very attractive at first but i have given it a thought for a long while. I made a study about this when i was in college and at that time i so wanted to read other people’s thoughts. What if i had that ability? But now it’s something that i fear. I don’t want to be bothered by other’s thoughts, especially my family. It would pain me to learn the truth and what i might learn might hurt me and hurt my relationship with others. So i’m contented not knowing what’s going on in their minds.

From tessa9

I don’t think that I would want to know what people are thinking especially if it is about me. If they think of something bad against me then I will take it the bad way. It will be weird if I am angry with them without them knowing why. I like to have the ability to be invincible or transport from place to place. I am late all the time so I would want to be in a place in just a snap.

From SmilesKiwi

I wouldn’t want that ability to read other peoples minds. I have a hard enough time reading my own mind. I just like the way I am. If everyone in the world were able to read minds then it would be normal. I would so like the invisible power.

From trinidadvelasco

Hehehehehe. You are amusing, smile. How true indeed to the name that you have chosen. This is the first time that I have encountered someone who claims to be finding it hard to read one’s own mind. lol. But to wish to have the power of invisibility! I think that is the most powerful tool that anyone can have and thus, almost anyone wants to have it, too.

From naseemkum

Having the power of knowing others mind would be a good thing when we take everything as positive. Its sometimes creates problems also others wont accept when u say them about what they had thinked about u negative. But i assure u that humans can have those powers i tried some books to learn telekinesis and telepathy. Its not the process of knowing others mind. Telekinesis is science of moving objects and telepathy is conveys message from our mind to others mind. But knowing others mind is a occultism manner that we have to learn if we had more esp powers with us.

From tamirs

If given a chance to have a super power at least for a day,i’d like to have super charm power..My mother sells cooked food everyday,maybe if i have the ability to charm people in,she wont have a hard time selling her goods..don’t like to read other people’s mind because i respect privacy too much as i want my privacy be respected..

From captinjack

Well, interesting question. If i was given a super power just for one day, i would like to have a power which can enable me to hit the jackpot with one lottery. And with the money, i can accomplish my dreams such as travelling around the world, having a further study in U.S.A and letting my parents get retired in advanced. Wow, even imagining of the picture can make me very happy. I have got to admit that i am not a good Samaritan. I should help others out as soon as i am rich. But that is what is at the bottom of my heart.

From ardoy0731

Quite interesting.Telekinesis and telepathy are nice ability if I have super power.But given a chance to have a super power I would like to choose Superman’s power,cause I really wanted to fly to see the whole world..

From Triple0

Wouldn’t it be great if you could read mines? It would be like the movie “What a woman wants”, it’d be so cool to read anyone’s thoughts! Like when a teacher flips a question towards you, you could just read her mind to find the answer! I could even cheat in my exams! But I think there’s a lot of disadvantages to this kind of super power. If you could read minds, what if you were in a crowd and everyone started to think at once. You would go bonkers! Also, like you said, you don’t want to strive in your loved ones’ deep sorrows and thoughts they wish to keep private from anyone else. You also don’t want to accidentally hear a random person’s dirty thoughts either.

From peavey

No way. I wouldn’t want to know what others were thinking, except in a very few cases and then I’m not sure I’d really want to know. I don’t know what power I’d like to have. None, really. They all come with a price that I don’t think I’d want to pay.

From bird123

I could probably handle reading other people’s thoughts. It’s not for everyone. I think most people would have their feelings hurt pretty quickly.

From Bianca-mergilliano

 agree with what you’ve said. I think it would be fun for me to read others thought so that at least I know what they’re going to do or say. Lie in these situations. If we’re going to have an examination, I would just read my seatmate’s mind. Haha I wouldn’t have a hard time. Just kidding. I don’t want to cheat. Another is, if I were in a public place and I saw someone who looks strange then I would read his mind and If I come to read that he is going to hold up someone or to do ban things at least I can do something to stop but not in an obvious way. I know some would not believe at first if they came to know that I can read minds so If I have this ability, I would just keep it in myself. Like what you’ve said, I also don’t like to read my loved ones thoughts. I don’t want to know their negative thoughts about me because I know its going to hurt me. Its painful especially if I have a boyfriend and were on a date then suddenly a pretty girl passes by, then I read his thought that “Ohh, that is so pretty, I wish she is my girlfriend.” Ouch. It hurts. Just like you, I like to read minds but with exemption.

From m4ndrrake

Hey, I think I know a movie like this. Do you know the movie “What Women Wants” starring Mel Gibson? I think in this movie he can read minds of girls that gets near him.

From trinidad_velasco

would like to have superpowers. I will never say no to any of them at all. However, the situation will be that I have full control over all and above it. Meaning, I can read minds and hear people’s thoughts only if I want to, only if I choose to. I will not be reading the minds of all the people in this world spontaneously or severally at all. Just like how telekinesis takes place. People with this gift moves things or whatever matter only if they concentrate while doing it. As for telepathy, it is a one good thing to have. Whenever you concentrate on a love one, you will immediately know whether you are needed by the person or not at any point in his/her life. Superpowers are really good to have. However, superresponsibilities also go with it.

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Why Criticism is Necessary

Criticism
Criticism (Photo credit: Celestine Chua)

While reading my FB friends’ posts which consist mostly of updates about super typhoon Yolanda, I noticed an update of a UP professor that I had been following, that says:

Because of my posts, many people are asking why am I criticizing the government when the priority is to help. We should never oppose assistance with critique. Our assistance should be compassion with justice. Without CNN Anderson Cooper’s criticism of relief operation, Korina Sanchez would have not gone to Tacloban; without the victims complaining themselves, the government would have continued its failed response, without the vigilance and criticism against government bureaucracy the relief good would have been hijacked and used for political purposes. And when we wait til the rehabilitation is over to voice out our criticisms, we will only get frustrated for the criminals had already fooled the people and entrenched themselves in their thrones. Help now, criticize later –the mantra of those in power.” – Gerry Lanuza

Most pro-PNoys, those who stood aloof because they have everything, and those who are wont to just keep silent even if a bad situation requires one to say something against, had also broken their silence by telling that what is needed from everyone else now is to help and not attack each other, not to wage war against our fellowmen, and not to berate the President and his officials.  Now that is some criticism, too, though some are unfounded, because we know for a fact that the sharpest criticisms come from those who are on the ground, and who had given a lot to help, and from those who had been trying hard to reach the afflicted in the quickest possible time.  But they help in ways making everybody be on guard of the words that come out – if they are already personal or ‘trollish’ and not constructive.

Criticisms connote the good and the bad but they are necessary.  If we go back to Prof. Lanuza’s post, it helps that there are people bold enough to say something about inconsistencies, irregularities, abnormalities, superficialities, impartialities, and all ‘ties and ‘ies that define evil in the midst of a tragedy such as this brought by the supertyphoon Yolanda.

I thought of expounding this but I just want to say it as simple as it is – criticisms are necessary, as Winston Churchill said:

Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.

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Experiencing Lam Tin Again

We were much in a vacation mood that’s why we prefer to eat out instead of preparing food for lunch after Eternal Gardens yesterday, November 1. Papsie wanted to try Lam Tin again because he craves for Chinese food.  Also, the children are hesitant to experiment Chinese at other restaurants because for them nothing beats Lam Tin for its savory but very affordable and delectable dishes. So off we went.  The excitement and anticipation never waned, almost died seeing food establishments along the way closed for business, and was up again upon seeing that Lam Tin was open to serve food.  As usual, there were a lot of customers/patrons.

Funny, that it was the Yang Chao fried rice that came first.  One can actually eat the rice without the viand.

november 1 003Then comes second was the pork asado with atsara (not in the picture).  It was so tender and the sauce has sesame seeds giving a distinct flavor to the dish.november 1 005It was the sweet and sour fish that was the favorite.  It was not too sweet nor too sour as we had experienced with other Chinese food restaurants.  According to Daryl, he heard that the sauce is made from tapioca that’s why the clear but glutinous sauce.  The parsley added a distinct flavor of freshness, too.

november 1 004The broccoli with shrimps is also good.  The children didn’t like it very much because of the ginger taste but I liked it a lot.  Broccoli is a favorite of mine and it can also be very tasty with oyster sauce.

november 1 006We were so full and satisfied that taking a nap after was next to our agenda when we came home.

november 1 002november 1 001

Did you see the satisfaction with the smiles?

 

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Complicated Love – Story #5

What do I think about a May (January)-December affair?

Freddie Aguilar
Cover of Freddie Aguilar

Recently, there was this news about the (in)famous Freddie Aguilar, and his affair with a 16 year-old girl. I have to admit that I was one of those who reacted nonconformably to the news.  It is but normal for a mother of a young girl to feel aghast that her young daughter is in a relationship with a 60 year-old man who is more than two decades older than her.

To wrap up the story that had circulated, Ka Freddie and his girlfriend met in a campaign sortie.  He didn’t know that the girl was only 16 because she looked physically mature for her age.  After that event, the affair began which triggered differing opinions and reactions from netizens and the common people alike when a photo was posted in a social network.

My thoughts:

An online psychologist wrote his views about the affair, stating the probable reasons why Ka Freddie fell for a very much younger girl and why the girl also fell for a very much older man.  It was a careful assessment ranging from his ‘biological wiring’ to his psychological gain.

I am not opposed to a May (January)-December affair only if the girl is with age.  By this, I mean the girl is more mature physically and mentally.  I would even include that the girl must be emotionally mature, too, but maturity can also vary among different individuals.   So with a woman aged 35 and with a lover aged 71, for example, that would be acceptable for me.

Why, one may ask? Contrary to notions that these older men have their foremost desires to be with a very much younger girl (in their teens) because they wanted to have partners with great child-bearing potential or have great chance of producing healthier offspring, I think most old men (especially those with children already from previous relationships) will not consider this (having a baby, or having babies) a priority thought in desiring to have a very much younger woman.  Having babies would require much of his responsibility and he would be back again to zero, taking care of a baby that would require physical presence, strength, and enough resources.  Who would want that when you are at your prime just wanting to enjoy the remaining years of your life?

No, I don’t believe it is about having babies.  I would agree that it is more about the psychological gain that even if he is already 60, he has a trophy girlfriend (from the daughter’s view).  As a woman, I feel upset with the notion that women (including young girls) are treated like mere trophies.  It is with allowing this ‘culture’ why men debase women.

Ka Freddie deserves his right to be in love, I do not contradict that but enough with the ‘talking about having babies’ crap.  I hope with his love, he would let the young girl grow and learn more about life than being stuck blindly to the idea that this is what life is for her.  I believe the young girl also dreams about many things, unless she is made to believe otherwise.

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From Wikipedia:

Freddie Aguilar known as Ka Freddie Aguilar is a folk musician from the Philippines.  He is best known for his rendition of “Bayan Ko“, which became the anthem for the opposition to the Marcos regime during the 1986 People Power Revolution, and for his song “Anak“, the best-selling Philippine music record of all time. He is heavily associated with Pinoy rock.

He is well known internationally, and within the Philippines and Asia-Pacific region, claiming fame as one of the best musician-songwriters of the Philippines.

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Is it big deal if it is the girlfriend that spends most of the time?

Early Participants in Sinulog 2013
Early Participants in Sinulog 2013 (Photo credit: giovzaid85)

The other day, during lunch, and as always in between discussions, I popped out a question – Is it big deal if in a bf-gf relationship, that the woman is the one that spends most of the time when they go out, eat out, or watch a movie?

In the Filipino culture, in the days of old, a man, even if he is already a boyfriend, continues to woo until the time they decide to marry if everything goes smooth until the wedding day.  By wooing, the man will have to curry favor by doing some work for the love of his life and for her family. It was customary of the man to always show his best character all the time and give gifts to his love.  The woman feels truly special during those moments. She does not have to prove her love by doing what her man should be doing, that is, spending money to prove her love. This is an account from women of that time, great grandparents and grandparents.

In answer to the question, the youngest in the group who is in her late twenties, replied that it is big deal to her.  She believes that even if they are already bf-gf, it is not fair that she’ll spend most of the time when they go out, or eat out, or watch a movie.  It is okay for her to share in the expenses but for a man to make his livelihood out of her girlfriend is not fair at all.

The younger guy in the group said that it should not be big deal if the woman allowed herself to be in the situation knowing that the guy earns less, or his earnings are just enough for himself, or is unemployed. It was an honest answer from a person who has radical thoughts.

In my opinion, a man should be ashamed of himself to allow a situation where most of the time it is the girlfriend who spends a lot when they go out. It is obvious that decency is forgotten, or deliberately set aside. It is like the woman is buying out or paying for, the love from her man.

What are your thoughts about this?

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Varied Taste in Music

What does it make of a person who appreciates different types of music genre? Nothing. The person just knows how to appreciate good music from whatever genre it belongs to no matter if other people consider said music as good or not.

I am one of those who are not fixated on one particular genre only, like some others who patronize rock and roll music, for example, only or above all other genre. If an artist sounds unique, with a twang that gets my attention, then the artist must be very good and/or versatile.

Valar Morghulis

Death
Death (Photo credit: tanakawho)

All men must die.  All men must serve (valar dohaeris).  Words from Game of Thrones.

Death always connotes that grim truth of ending life’s beauty.  As interpretation of the lines above by someone, that goes like this – “Saying “all men must die” is not really negative in its original meaning. As death is a gift. To respond with to that with ‘all men must serve’ really means that first all men must live as life is a service and the many faced god (I think the statements started as a faceless man tradition) decides when you die. So when it’s used in conversation, it means that one day we will die and be free but for now we will do our duty. – provides enlightment.

Even with that nice-sounding interpretation, death is scary. It must be a gift for some living dubious lives but with some who are still enjoying, cherishing, capturing, or hugging what life offers, it definitely is an omen.

Life is a coming and going process I have to agree.  Still death is unwelcome even with realizations such as this.

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It is a sad year for me. There are many deaths. The Grim Reaper seems to be prowling and had not reached its quota yet.  Most of them for me were still very young to be ‘reaped’.  Take for example the recent death of son Daryl’s friend who is only 20 years old.  She is a girl that seems to be full of aspirations and she will graduate as a nurse.  It must be very, very painful for the parents.  Who wouldn’t be shocked to know?

Many times I tell myself: “I hope when I die, it would be quick and silent and easy.”  It was a quick and silent death for the girl but I am not sure if it was easy to die via SUNDS (Sudden unexpected nocturnal death syndrome) or bangungot in the Filipino vernacular, if that is what the stated cause is.

Some deaths are unexpected, true, but the pain is not less with an expected death of a loved one. When my father died, it took me more than a year to get over.  It was needed for him to rest after a month of being in a coma but the pain did not go away instantly.  It lingered and it made me cry involuntarily anywhere I was that time.

Thinking about death of a beloved one scares me so.  The fear is so big that it engulfs and numbs.  Daily, prayers for supplication dance in my mouth just to keep them safe from danger and harm.  I am thankful that my daily supplication is heard and granted.

One day, it will be over for me, too.  I wish I would be able to do the things I love most before The Grim Reaper comes.

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