Is it big deal if it is the girlfriend that spends most of the time?

Early Participants in Sinulog 2013
Early Participants in Sinulog 2013 (Photo credit: giovzaid85)

The other day, during lunch, and as always in between discussions, I popped out a question – Is it big deal if in a bf-gf relationship, that the woman is the one that spends most of the time when they go out, eat out, or watch a movie?

In the Filipino culture, in the days of old, a man, even if he is already a boyfriend, continues to woo until the time they decide to marry if everything goes smooth until the wedding day.  By wooing, the man will have to curry favor by doing some work for the love of his life and for her family. It was customary of the man to always show his best character all the time and give gifts to his love.  The woman feels truly special during those moments. She does not have to prove her love by doing what her man should be doing, that is, spending money to prove her love. This is an account from women of that time, great grandparents and grandparents.

In answer to the question, the youngest in the group who is in her late twenties, replied that it is big deal to her.  She believes that even if they are already bf-gf, it is not fair that she’ll spend most of the time when they go out, or eat out, or watch a movie.  It is okay for her to share in the expenses but for a man to make his livelihood out of her girlfriend is not fair at all.

The younger guy in the group said that it should not be big deal if the woman allowed herself to be in the situation knowing that the guy earns less, or his earnings are just enough for himself, or is unemployed. It was an honest answer from a person who has radical thoughts.

In my opinion, a man should be ashamed of himself to allow a situation where most of the time it is the girlfriend who spends a lot when they go out. It is obvious that decency is forgotten, or deliberately set aside. It is like the woman is buying out or paying for, the love from her man.

What are your thoughts about this?

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