When one feels indebted in her role as a mother, she gets confused if she is already crossing the line against her children’s own set of principles. Then there is this nagging truth that they are already young adults and are trying to live their own in their own ways. Sometimes though it can be annoying when children forget about little things like house rules where a mother or a father or a guardian is held hostage by love that demands understanding and patience. Most of the time, a lot of these are required.
I am not demanding homage like they have to put me, and my other half, at the pedestal. Some parents can be this demanding. I give them freedom as much as I would want it given me – in generous amounts but taking into account sensibility or an emotional response to situations when needed. Children at times though can be illogical, or irrational, even with kindness pushing parents to brinks of disgust .
It can be exasperating, I know, to always try to be fair and sensible when children do not seem to realize the effort it takes to at least become one good parent if not perfect.
I give myself time to ponder my own ways and principles. I frequently talk to my other half about assorted feelings of annoyance, frustration, or indignation. It can be gratifying to have someone equally sensible and understanding, though we do not agree all the time, to stay sharp. I think we both need these moments to keep afloat.
A parent’s lament is different from one to another. I have mine, as I conceive it, as spice to this wonderful life as a mother, as a parent, as a friend to a child though I am his or her parent, and as a co-parent. I have to say that there are more boons than snags.