It is very easy for anyone to say that Marlene Aguilar was wrong for not taking Jayson Ivler in to the police or for harboring him (considered a criminal during the time he was being surveyed) inside her home in Blue Ridge, Quezon City. Some would confidently, being self-important, that they would hand in an erring child anytime. What I am certain about is the thought that one can never be too sure until one had experienced what another is experiencing.
I can say that most parents have this inclination to protect their children in whatever form they can. I have felt this way lots of times and have witnessed a number of parents do the same. That is understandable for a parent to do but in a case such as Jason’s where he had inflicted harm and more so, slain people just because of his uncontrollable rage, it appears to be out of line.
It spells of wrong love for a parent’s child. True love for the children is one where wrongdoers are punished but corrected. True love for one’s children do not tolerate wrong or evil deeds. This kind of parental affection where parents always stand up for the children even if they are wrong or had done something bad, especially against other people, could never protect them from future self- destruction. It is like having to buy Nascarjackets to protect your son from racing accidents and you know they cannot be protected.
For reasons of expounding on the issue, perhaps one of the reason for tolerating a child’s misdeeds is to cover up one’s (as a parent) neglect to function as a parent to a child, and failure to realize one’s weaknesses and work on them to correct them. Parents’ deficiencies are passed on to the children even unconsciously.
Some parents also believe that to give in, with eyes closed, to their children’s whims will make them better than any parent. This is a notion that has stunk for years and could never help produce responsible citizens.
I leave a piece of understanding for Marlene though she could have weighed the consequences of loving in a wrong way.